IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Some people say that the main environmental problem of our time is the loss of particular species of plants and animals. Others say that there are more important environmental problems. discuss both views and give your own opinion.

There is no denying the fact that in
this
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 era we have faced many
enviromental
Correct your spelling
environmental
 issues.
While
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 it is a commonly held belief that the main reason
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
this
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 problem is our
losses
Fix the agreement mistake
loss
show examples
 of important
kind
Fix the agreement mistake
kinds
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 of animals and trees.
there
Fix capitalization
There
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 is
also
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 an argument that there
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
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 many purposes
have
Correct pronoun usage
that have
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 caused to
destroy
Replace the word
destruction
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the
Change preposition
of the
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eco system
Use the right word
ecosystem
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.
This
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 essay will analyse
this
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 topic from both points of view and express my opinion. On one hand, there are many species of plants
contribute
Correct pronoun usage
that contribute
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 to
conservation
Correct article usage
the conservation
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the
Change preposition
of the
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 environment.
In other words
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, they can increase the percentage of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Oxygen by
generation
Replace the word
generating
show examples
 it, which
help
Correct subject-verb agreement
helps
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 to
resistance
Replace the word
resist
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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global warming.
In addition
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, the animals have a major role in eco
system
Use the right word
ecosystem
show examples
, they can achieve the balance between the wildlife and nature.
For example
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,
according to
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 a new study held in America, they discovered that the
African
Correct word choice
extinct African
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 elephants that extinct, was have a role in tree planting by kicking the tree
and
Punctuation problem
, and
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then
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 it
will
Wrong verb form
would
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 grow
,
Punctuation problem
;
show examples
Linking Words
also
Punctuation problem
also,
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 it was a main food resource to many wild
animales
Correct your spelling
animals
.
On the other hand
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, the
humans
Fix the agreement mistake
human
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 factors have caused
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
many negative
affect
Use the right word
effects
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 in our nature, more than any
Correct word choice
other reasons
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reasons
Fix the agreement mistake
reason
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. It is
also
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 possible to say that the
gases emission
Fix the agreement mistake
gas emissions
show examples
,
that
Correct pronoun usage
which
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 come from factories,
has
Correct subject-verb agreement
have
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 caused
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
a lot of issues, like climate change, which has led to
extinct
Correct word choice
the extinction of
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 many
faces
Check wording
species
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 of life.
Moreover
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, if we continue
to
Change preposition
with
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this
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 approach, over time, other species will disappear. In conclusion, there are no easy
anwers
Correct your spelling
answers
 to
this
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 question. On balance,
however
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, I tend to believe that the other causes of the environmental problem are more essential to
handl
Correct your spelling
handle
 it.

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task achievement
Make sure to include a clear thesis statement in your introduction that clearly states your opinion.
coherence and cohesion
Try to connect your ideas more clearly. Use linking words like 'firstly', 'secondly', and 'finally' to help your reader understand the flow of your argument.
grammar
Use correct subject-verb agreements, like 'there are many species' instead of 'there is many species'.
coherence and cohesion
Try to break your ideas into clearer paragraphs, each covering one main point, to improve your structure.
content
You have a good understanding of the environmental issues and present different perspectives about them.
content
You provided specific examples, such as African elephants, which help strengthen your argument.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • biodiversity
  • extinction
  • habitat loss
  • ecosystem
  • food chain
  • imbalance
  • interconnected
  • climate change
  • pollution
  • personal actions
  • policy changes
  • education
  • awareness
What to do next:
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