In many countries, childhood obesity is a growing problem. What are the reasons for this and what can individuals and governments do to tackle the problem?

Childhood obesity is a pressing concern in many nations, driven by lifestyle and environmental factors.

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essay will examine the key causes of

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issue and explore solutions that individuals and governments can implement. There are several major reasons for

rising

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the rise in

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childhood obesity. The first has to do with the increasing consumption of unhealthy foods. Fast food, high in fat and sugar, has become more accessible, leading to poor diets among children.

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, the availability of processed snacks and sugary drinks has undoubtedly worsened the problem. Another factor is the decline in physical activity. The rise of digital entertainment,

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as video games and social media, has led to a sedentary lifestyle, reducing outdoor activities.

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, busy work schedules prevent parents from preparing nutritious meals or encouraging exercise, reinforcing unhealthy habits. Schools

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contribute to the problem by offering unhealthy cafeteria options and

prioritizing

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prioritising

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academic performance over physical education. To combat

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, both individuals and governments must take action. In terms of what the first category can do, parents should

prioritize

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prioritise

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home-cooked meals. All adults involved in raising the child ought to reduce the amount of time children spend watching TV or using electronic devices and encourage more active forms of entertainment, like playing outdoors or participating in hobbies that require movement. Governments, meanwhile, should regulate junk food advertising targeted at children and impose higher taxes on sugary products. Investing in public awareness campaigns about nutrition and exercise can

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educate families on maintaining a healthy lifestyle.

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, urban planners on the government's payroll should create more parks and recreational spaces to promote physical exercise. In conclusion, childhood obesity stems from unhealthy diets, sedentary lifestyles, and inadequate institutional policies.

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, through a combination of parental guidance and government intervention,

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issue can be effectively addressed.

seunghakangs

Jul 27, 2025

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coherence and cohesion

Your introduction clearly states the topic. In your conclusion, you could summarize the main points more explicitly to reinforce your argument.

task achievement

Make sure to provide more specific examples to support your ideas. This will strengthen your argument even more.

coherence and cohesion

You provided a clear structure with an introduction, main body paragraphs, and a conclusion.

task achievement

You identified key reasons and solutions to childhood obesity, showing a good understanding of the topic.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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6
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

295 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

childhood obesity
sedentary lifestyle
balanced diet
fast food
sugary snacks
physical activity
nutrition education
health campaigns
public health initiatives
government regulations
home-cooked meals
extracurricular sports
digital entertainment
sedentary behavior

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In many countries, childhood obesity is a growing problem. What are the reasons for this and what can individuals and governments do to tackle the problem?

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

Write a letter to a company asking for a refund for something you bought from them online. In your letter include: what you bought what the problem is why you want a refund write 150 words atleast in 20 minutes.

According to reports, maintaining museums open to the public is becoming more and more costly. Describe the benefits of preserving museums. How can we best finance them? (Government, industry, private citizen, etc.)

People these days watch TV, films and other programmes alone rather than with other people. Do the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages.

Some people think that children should be taught to be competitive in school. Others, however, say that cooperation and teamwork skills are more important. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

Some people think that one should plan detailed activities for their leisure time, while others disagree with this view. Discuss both views and give your own opinion