Some children spend hours everyday on their smartphones.Why is this the case?Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

Excessive use of smartphones has become a pressing matter globally.
Children
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are investing a
lot
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of their
time
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on mobile
phones
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on a daily basis.The reason behind
this
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must be the craze of social media and different types of virtual playing platforms.I concur that
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it has a detrimental effect on the lives of people. On the one hand, nowadays,everyone is idolising the busy city life.Parents are not getting enough
time
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to look after their
children
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due to
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their hectic
schedule
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, and
therefore
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,they are making their
children
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engage
in
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with
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mobile
phones
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.
Moreover
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, platforms like Facebook, Instagram, TikTok,pubg are very famous among
children
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and youngsters.
Hence
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,they are wasting a
lot
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of their
time
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in these areas.
For example
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,students are given more priority and
also
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encouraged every friend to make accounts on every social media,which
further
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makes
children
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feel that it is a crucial part of their life.
However
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, these activities are causing a
lot
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of harm in
children
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's lives.In recent days,teachers are complaining that students are not able to concentrate for a long
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in the classroom.
Furthermore
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,the concept of playing games in the playground is slowly vanishing among
children
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.They are more attracted towards playing games online.
Children
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are suffering from various health diseases.
For instance
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, even young people are suffering from health diseases like obesity.Most of the
children
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are victims of autism,which is a disease caused
due to
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the harmful rays emitted by smartphones ,
according to
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doctors and other health experts. In conclusion,since mobile
phones
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are used unnecessarily by
children
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,they must be made aware of the harmful effects of gadgets.Parents must give more
time
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to
children
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,
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so that they can learn moral values and engage in more productive activities.If utilised properly, mobile
phones
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can serve a
lot
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to humans.
Otherwise
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, humans will be the slaves of gadgets.Keeping
this
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thing in mind,
children
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must learn to balance between social life and entertainment
time
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.

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coherence and cohesion
Make sure each paragraph clearly relates to the main point of the essay and follows a logical order.
task response
Include more examples and explanations to support your arguments.
coherence and cohesion
Use more varied sentence structures to make the writing more engaging.
task achievement
The essay addresses both reasons for smartphone use and its effects on children.
task achievement
The conclusion effectively summarizes the main points and offers advice.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • smartphones
  • usage
  • technology
  • accessibility
  • convenience
  • entertainment
  • gaming
  • social media
  • communication
  • educational resources
  • addiction
  • dependence
  • negative effects
  • physical health
  • mental health
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