Many museums and historical sites are mainly visited by tourists, but not local people. Why is this the case and what can be done to attract more local people to visit these places?

Nowadays
Punctuation problem
Nowadays,
show examples
some
museum
Fix the agreement mistake
museums
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and historical sites are
a lot of
Fix the agreement mistake
apply
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mainly visited by tourists
Linking Words
due
Change preposition
because
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to
,
Punctuation problem
apply
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did
Wrong verb form
do
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not
come
Verb problem
have
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local
inhabitant
Fix the agreement mistake
inhabitants
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.
This
Linking Words
essay will discuss
main
Correct article usage
the main
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reason
Fix the agreement mistake
reasons
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why
local
Fix the agreement mistake
locals
show examples
are visiting museums and offer
proper
Correct article usage
a proper
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solution
Use synonyms
to mitigate
this
Linking Words
issue.
However
Linking Words
, why some local
people
Use synonyms
did not
visited
Wrong verb form
visit
show examples
the reason
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
show examples
different
Correct article usage
a different
show examples
solution
Use synonyms
Punctuation problem
. Firstly
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firstly
Linking Words
Punctuation problem
, its
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its
Use the right word
it is
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familiarity because the local
humanity
Check wording
community
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known
Wrong verb form
knows
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main
Correct article usage
the main
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tradition
Replace the word
traditional
show examples
things and famous
person
Fix the agreement mistake
people
show examples
. Local
people
Use synonyms
are bored
Linking Words
while
Punctuation problem
, while
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it will be interesting for foreign
people
Use synonyms
.For that reason, local
people
Use synonyms
do not have a desire to go to places they have visited before. Some
schools teacher
Fix the agreement mistake
school teachers
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are go
Verb problem
take their students
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to museums
in
Punctuation problem
, in
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students
such
Linking Words
as some kind of children
do
Correct pronoun usage
who do
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not have
go to
Correct word order
to go
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there
.
Verb problem
can.
show examples
For that, do not see
new
Correct article usage
the new
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exhibition
one
Punctuation problem
; one
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tradition
Replace the word
traditional
show examples
things
see
Verb problem
apply
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for students get bored and don’t want
there
Verb problem
to be there
show examples
.
Also
Linking Words
,
people
Use synonyms
do not want
pay
Verb problem
to pay
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to visit there because of do not have enough money. It has a number of
Use synonyms
solution
Fix the agreement mistake
solutions
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for
Linking Words
this
Fix the agreement mistake
these
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cases.
Linking Words
Firstly
Punctuation problem
Firstly,
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create a new atmosphere for visitors.
Government
Correct article usage
The government
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should create
technical
Correct article usage
a technical
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device which produces
virtual
Correct article usage
a virtual
show examples
exhibition.
Correct your spelling
Moreover
Morover
Punctuation problem
Morover,
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they can invite some finance
people
Use synonyms
once
a
Correct pronoun usage
they a
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wealth
Replace the word
wealthy
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to attract
children
Check wording
children's
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attention.
Linking Words
However
Add a comma
However,
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it should be free or there should be some kind of discount. In
conclusion
Add a comma
conclusion,
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this
Linking Words
essay
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
show examples
Use synonyms
solution
Correct article usage
a solution
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if
government
Correct article usage
the government
show examples
do
this
Linking Words
new exhibition
and
Punctuation problem
, and
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it should be
discount
Replace the word
discounted
show examples
Punctuation problem
. In
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In local
Change preposition
Local
show examples
people
Use synonyms
should be visiting.

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task achievement
Work on adding more clear ideas in your essay.
coherence and cohesion
Try to use better linking words to connect your sentences.
task achievement
Make sure to write more details in each paragraph.
task achievement
You made a good attempt to present both reasons and solutions.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has an introduction and a conclusion, which is good.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Take for granted
  • Economical constraints
  • Routine obligations
  • Programming
  • Cater
  • Engagement
  • Community involvement
  • Personal connection
  • Cultural relevance
  • Discounts
  • Sense of ownership
  • Interactive exhibits
  • Local traditions
  • Field trips
  • Cultural bond
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