IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

Some people have decided to reduce the number of times they fly every year or to stop flying altogether. Do you think the environmental benefits of this development outweigh the disadvantages for individuals and businesses?

There is a growing discussion about whether people should reduce their carbon footprints by limiting or even avoiding
air
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travel
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.
While
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 some argue that
this
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 trend may cause certain economic problems, I firmly believe that the long-term environmental benefits far outweigh the drawbacks. On the one hand, reducing
air
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travel
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 could negatively impact the aviation industry. Airlines may face reduced revenues, leading to job losses and financial difficulties for former employees.
Moreover
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, a significant decline in
air
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travel
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 might reduce long-distance tourism, which could harm the economies of popular tourist destinations that rely heavily on international visitors.
On the other hand
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, taking fewer flights is a crucial step in reducing global carbon emissions. Studies have shown that
air
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travel
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 is one of the most carbon-intensive forms of transportation. If we fail to act, global temperatures will continue to rise, leading to severe consequences
such
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 as rising sea levels, more frequent natural disasters, and the loss of biodiversity. In
this
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 context, reducing unnecessary flights is not only a responsible personal choice but
also
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 a necessary action to protect the planet for future generations. In conclusion,
although
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 limiting
air
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travel
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 may pose short-term challenges for industries like aviation and tourism, it brings substantial environmental advantages in the long run. A balanced approach, where people only fly when necessary, is the most sustainable solution.

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task achievement
You can add more specific examples to strengthen your arguments. For instance, mention countries that have implemented restrictions on flights or successful initiatives to reduce emissions.
coherence cohesion
Try to vary your sentence structures to make your writing more engaging. Using a mix of simple and complex sentences can help with flow.
coherence cohesion
Your introduction clearly states your position, and your conclusion effectively summarizes your main points.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • reduce
  • benefits
  • environment
  • pollution
  • travel
  • businesses
  • individuals
  • challenges
  • meetings
  • connections
  • effort
  • manage
  • remotely
  • money
  • stress
  • local
  • culture
  • discovering
  • innovative
  • technology
  • ways
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