Today many children are very overweight. This has created a very serious health problem. Give the reasons for this and give some solutions to fix this problem.

The world has changed in many ways when it comes to health and overweight problems.

Children

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nowadays are starting to become obese and unhealthy

due to

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their bad nutrition .

This

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essay will explore the reasons for

this

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and some solutions to fix

this

Linking Words

problem

Use synonyms

. On the one hand, there are multiple reasons for

obesity

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children

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. Primarily, restaurants and fast

food

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are becoming really easy for everybody to consume. That's because of the delivery apps that make it easy to order

food

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Also

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this

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type of

food

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is high in fat and calories.

In addition

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, laziness plays a big role in

obesity

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children

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In addition

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, laziness plays a big role in

obesity

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children

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This

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is mainly caused by the high intake of cheap dopamine from social media apps or video games .

Also

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, video games consume

children

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's time and do not allow for exercise .

Finally

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, the main reason for the

obesity

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problem

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in kids is a lack of exercise.

Children

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do not move very much and have a sedentary lifestyle.

On the other hand

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, there are a few effective solutions to tackle

this

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problem

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First,

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children

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can get a gym membership . Exercising is essential to everybody , especially

children

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Therefore

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, the best way to start exercising is to get a gym membership .

Furthermore

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, eating healthy and making sure that the

food

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kids consume is of high quality.

This

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can reduce the percentage of obese

children

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. Good nutrition is necessary not only to stop

obesity

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but

Correct word order

also to

show examples

also

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help develop

children

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's brains and bodies.

In addition

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, parents should make sure that their

children

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are conscious of what they eat .

Also

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, they should make sure that they know what the awful side effects of being overweight are. In conclusion, it is clear to see the reasons for the high percentage of overweight

children

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in the world .

However

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, there are many solutions to tackle

this

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problem

Use synonyms

alfred

Aug 6, 2025

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task achievement

Make sure to give clear examples to support your main points. This will help make your ideas stronger.

coherence and cohesion

Try to organize your paragraphs better. Each paragraph should clearly support one main idea.

coherence and cohesion

Avoid repeating phrases and ideas. Try to use more varied language to make your writing more interesting.

task achievement

The introduction clearly states the topic and what the essay will discuss.

task achievement

You provided some good solutions to the problem, which is important in answering the task.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

322 words

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Today many children are very overweight. This has created a very serious health problem. Give the reasons for this and give some solutions to fix this problem.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Some people think that Olympic games are exciting events that bring other nations together. Others say Olympics is a waste of money and the money could be better spent on other things. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Government spending on restroration of old buildings in cities should be stopped. Instead they should spend money in housing and road development . Do you agree or disagree with this.

It is important to give children the chance to act independently and make their own decisions from an early age.

(Livia) Your manager has asked you to arrange a party for a colleague who is leaving the company. Write a letter to your manager. In your letter – Suggest a suitable date and time for the party – Recommend a venue – Propose the food and entertainment options that should be available.