IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 8

Some people think that the best way to reduce air pollution is to limit the use of private vehicles and promote public transport. Others believe there are more effective ways to tackle this issue. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

In recent years, the rise in air pollution has provoked heated debate.
While
Linking Words
 some argue that limiting private car use and promoting public
transport
Use synonyms
 is the best remedy, others contend that wider measures are required; I find the latter view more convincing. On the one hand, restricting private vehicles clearly reduces urban emissions and congestion. It has been demonstrated that modal shifts to metro systems, trams and electric buses lower per-passenger emissions, and where congestion charges have been introduced, traffic volumes have been reduced.
For example
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, after congestion pricing was implemented in some major cities, measurable declines in nitrogen oxides and particulates were reported.
Thus
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, encouraging public
transport
Use synonyms
 use and supporting
last
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-mile connections constitutes an effective component of any strategy.
On the other hand
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, concentrating only on cars would leave many sources unaddressed. Large shares of airborne pollution are produced by power generation and industrial activity, and agricultural practices are
also
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 responsible for greenhouse gases and particulates.
For instance
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, stricter emissions standards for factories and rapid deployment of renewable energy have been shown to produce substantial long-term improvements when they are enforced.
In addition
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, agricultural methane can be mitigated through improved livestock management and incentives for low-emission techniques.
Therefore
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, a multi-pronged policy — combining
transport
Use synonyms
 measures with industrial regulation, energy transition and agricultural reform — is needed if air quality is to be improved sustainably. In conclusion,
although
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 reducing private car use is beneficial, the most effective approach is a comprehensive one in which
transport
Use synonyms
 policies are implemented alongside strong industrial, energy and agricultural measures.

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structure
Make the plan of your essay clear. Start with what you will say, then show how you prove it, and finish with a short end that repeats your view.
structure
Tell both sides well, then give your own view. Put your own view at the end of the body or in the last line of the intro.
content
Give more fact or number if you can. This makes your claim stronger.
language
Keep long ideas in small lines. Use simple, short sentences to keep clear meaning.
language
Check small errors in spelling and grammar to keep the flow of reading.
content
Clear view on the topic and a strong end that matches the start.
cohesion
Good link words like on the other hand and in addition to link ideas.
content
Useful examples such as congestion pricing and rules for factories to show points.
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