In some countries, there are more young people choosing to enrol in work-based training instead of attending university. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

In some nations, young people would likely choose to join work-based training rather than
enroll
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enrol
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in a university.
This
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essay will argue that
although
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joining work-based training provides the trainee with more
experience
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in the field, the danger of losing the
job
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far outweighs any benefits. Many undergraduate students, after graduation, lack the
experience
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needed to join large companies or firms.
Therefore
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, many young students consider work-based training to gain firsthand
experience
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in the workforce.
This
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will help them achieve promotions more quickly, especially since these programs often
last
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between two and three years.
For example
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, a company headquartered in Saudi Arabia called Aramco runs a yearly work-based training program named ITC after high school.
Additionally
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, many participants receive
job
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offers at Aramco after completing the program.
This
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shows that the program provides trainees with valuable
experience
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that helps them qualify for employment. The risk of losing
the
Correct article usage
a
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job
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and not getting high-level promotions after joining work-based training programs might occur since many of those people do not have a university certificate. Not having a certificate in their
specialization
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specialisation
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not only prevents the employee from getting higher-level promotions but
also
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leads to not getting
job
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offers from other companies.
Furthermore
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, college
graduates
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would likely be employed at a higher grade than the trainee, because they have a degree.
This
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also
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means that their work might be easier and get promoted quicker.
For instance
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, at the Aramco company, newly university-graduated students will be employed at grade 13,
whereas
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trainees in ITC would begin their journey in grade 9.
This
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indicates that college
graduates
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might be provided with several features, including free healthcare and access to high-level entertainment parks on campus,
while
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work-based training
graduates
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would not receive.
To conclude
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, enrolling in work-based training programs would provide the trainee with more
experience
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in the field;
however
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, the risk of not changing your
job
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and not receiving higher bonuses compared to college
graduates
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far outweighs the advantages.

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Task Response
Be clear on your view in every part. State one strong idea and show why it is true. Try to talk about both sides, then say why your view stands.
Coherence and Cohesion
Use good link words to move ideas. Start each paragraph with a topic sentence and end with a short note that links to the next part. Do not blend ideas without a clear flow.
Strength
You take a clear view of the issue.
Strength
You give a real example (Aramco) to show your point.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example
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