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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Many countries import a large amount of food from other parts of the world. Is this a posistive or negative development?

A range
number
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apply
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of countries all over the world are heavily
rely
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reliant
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 on importing a huge amount of
food
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 from distant regions.
While
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this
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 practice offers some benefits, I
stongly
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strongly
 believe that
overall
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 it is a negative
development
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due to
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 both environmental and
agrucultural
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agricultural
 problems that
this
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development
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 brings. There are so many benefits of importing
food
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 from other countries
and
Punctuation problem
, and
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 one obvious advantage of
this
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 practice is that it
increasesthe
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increases the
 variety of foods
that
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is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
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 available for the consumers.
This
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, in turn, provides an opportunity to the local people to enjoy some seasonal fruits
as well as
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 some
ecxotic
Correct your spelling
exotic
 ones year round,
such
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 as strawberries and mangoes in any season, which would be impossible to taste
due to
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 the climate of the country.
In addition
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, the diversity not only develops the diet but
also
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 allows individuals to experience the foods of different cultures
though
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through
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 their dishes.
Therefore
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, importing
the
Correct article usage
apply
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food
Use synonyms
 from other nations would result in positive
development
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 in countries with
the
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apply
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limited access to
variety
Correct article usage
a variety
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 of foods.
However
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, the drawbacks can be significant as importing
the
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apply
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food
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 to
the
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apply
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one country could negatively impact the environment
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together
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, together
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 with the local agriculture of the country.
Firstly
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, transporting
food
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 over long distances requires large amounts of fuel, contributing to carbon emissions and climate change.
For example
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, importing fresh vegetables from South America to Europe creates
a
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apply
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far greater environmental issues
,
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apply
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 than planting them locally.
Secondly
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, a dependence on imported goods can weaken the local farming industries. Local farmers may struggle to compete with cheaper products from abroad, leading to a decline in agricultural jobs and threatening a country’s
food
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 economy in times of global crisis. In conclusion,
while
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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importing
ecxotic
Correct your spelling
exotic
 fruits and vegetables
provuides
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provides
variety and can help to feed a large
number of
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apply
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population in some regions, I think that
this
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 is generally
negative
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a negative
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development
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 as
this
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 trend creates significant issues
to
Change preposition
for
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 the environment and local farmers.

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task response
Be clear about your view in the opening paragraph and keep it to the end.
task response
Give 2–3 clear ideas and small examples to support them.
coherence
Each paragraph should talk about one idea. Start with a short topic sentence.
coherence
Link ideas with simple words like 'but', 'however', 'also', 'therefore'.
grammar
Check spelling and spacing in words to avoid mistakes.
content
The essay shows a real effort to talk about both sides.
structure
The structure is clear: intro, body, conclusion.
content
A real example is given to back a point (South America to Europe).

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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