Some people say free time activities for children should be organized by parents. Others say children should be free to choose what they do in their free time. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

There is a debate over how youngsters should spend their free

time

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while

Linking Words

some say that

parents

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should organise their children’s spare

time

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, and others argue that freedom is essential to them, and they should be able to spend their

time

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as they please. In my opinion,

while

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organising children’s free

time

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is beneficial, children should decide for themselves how to spend their

time

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, as it can encourage lifelong learning and intrinsic motivation. Organising children’s pastime has some benefits, as it can provide structure and balance. Younger generations often don’t know how to balance study, rest and play, and it can lead to wasting

time

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For instance

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, they always tend to play video games for their whole

time

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instead

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of reading books or doing homework, and it can negatively impact their mental health.

Therefore

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, guardians should set limits on screen

time

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, and they need to allocate their

time

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properly to prevent

this

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issue.

However

Linking Words

, too much parental control or rigid scheduling can

also

Linking Words

have negative effects on children

Punctuation problem

apply

show examples

because it limits independence and decision-making. If

parents

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always decide how youngsters spend their

time

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, kids don’t learn how to manage their own schedules.

For example

Linking Words

, if

parents

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plan every activity, like piano on Monday and soccer on Wednesday, the child never learns to choose for themselves. Later, they may struggle to manage their own

time

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Thus

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, raising them to be free is more beneficial and

also

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helps them to become independent. In conclusion,

while

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managing kids' schedules provides benefits and opportunities for them,

this

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limits their freedom and prevents them from being independent.

Parents

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should give them freedom and responsibility.

makemoneyizzy16

Aug 17, 2025

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tip

Make your main idea clear in the first paragraph and keep it the same through the essay.

tip

Link each idea well. Use simple links to join thoughts so the reader can follow fast.

strength

You show your view and you give both sides and your own view.

strength

Good use of links like However and For example.

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9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

271 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

balanced development
expose children to
tailored activities
promote discipline
foster independence
genuine interests
free play
problem-solving skills
emotional well-being
unstructured time
personal exploration
structured activities

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