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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The chart below gives information about car ownerwhip in the UK from 1975 to 2005.

The chart below gives information about car ownerwhip in the UK from 1975 to 2005.
The line graph compares the number of households in the UK owning no
car
Use synonyms
, one
car
Use synonyms
, two
cars
Use synonyms
 or three
cars
Use synonyms
 between 1975 and 2005.
Overall
Linking Words
, it can be seen that the proportion of households with one or more
cars
Use synonyms
 rose,
while
Linking Words
 the figure
those
Change preposition
for those
show examples
 without a
car
Use synonyms
 fell
steadly
Correct your spelling
steadily
 during the period. In 1975, the
persentages
Correct your spelling
percentages
 of families with no
car
Use synonyms
 and with one
car
Use synonyms
 were almost
thye
Correct your spelling
the
 same, at 43% and 45% respectively.
However
Linking Words
, the proportion without a
car
Use synonyms
 dropped slightly
at
Change preposition
to
show examples
 25% in 1985 and
then
Linking Words
 declined
gradully
Correct your spelling
gradually
at
Change preposition
to
show examples
 20% in 2005.
While
Linking Words
 the families with two
cars
Use synonyms
 were 6% in
1975
Punctuation problem
1975,
show examples
then
Linking Words
this
Linking Words
encreased
Use the right word
increased
show examples
 sharply
at
Change preposition
to
show examples
 14% in
1985
Punctuation problem
1985,
show examples
then
Linking Words
this
Linking Words
 figure
climb
Wrong verb form
climbed
show examples
 rapidly
at
Change preposition
to
show examples
 15% in 1995
Punctuation problem
,
show examples
and
growth
Replace the word
grew
show examples
 slightly
at
Change preposition
to
show examples
 19% in 2005. Regarding the three
cars
Use synonyms
 started at 3% in 1975 and
uncreased
Use the right word
increased
show examples
 slowly at 5% in
1985
Punctuation problem
1985,
show examples
then
Linking Words
this
Linking Words
 figure increased gradually at 9% in 2005.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
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Vocabulary: Replace the words car, cars with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "slightly" was used 2 times.
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