The crime among teenagers has increased dramatically in many countries Discuss some possible reasons for this increase and suggest solutions

Since the

last

Linking Words

decade, the number of crimes committed by teenagers has increased dramatically around the world.

This

Linking Words

concerning issue must be

analyzed

Use the right word

analysed

show examples

and discussed in order to find effective solutions. One of the main reasons for

this

Linking Words

growth is the decreasing attendance of children at school. Many teenagers abandon educational institutions, arguing that classes are boring and irrelevant to their future. When they are not engaged in studies, they often spend time on the streets, where they can be influenced by negative

behaviors

Use the right word

behaviours

show examples

In addition

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, the lack of job opportunities plays a crucial role. With limited education, many young people struggle to find employment and see no prospects for a stable future. A study published in the Journal of Social Sciences revealed that seventy

percent

Use the right word

per cent

show examples

of Brazilian citizens have not completed high school, which drastically reduces their chances of getting well-paid jobs

such

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as becoming doctors or lawyers.

Consequently

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, some individuals with no academic background or professional skills attempt to improve their lives through illegal actions,

such

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as robbing houses and banks. There are,

however

Linking Words

, ways to address these problems.

Firstly

Linking Words

, schools should invest in sports and cultural

centers

Use the right word

centres

show examples

, encouraging students to focus on healthy activities and teamwork.

Such

Linking Words

initiatives would reduce school dropout rates and provide a positive environment for teenagers.

Moreover

Linking Words

, governments should create more employment opportunities with fair salaries, motivating young people to discover new abilities and to build a better future without resorting to crime. In conclusion, education and job opportunities are essential to prevent the increase of juvenile crime. By addressing these issues, societies can create safer and more promising environments for the next generations.

barretomariaclara7

Aug 21, 2025

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improvement

You cover causes and fixes, but go more deep. add more reasons and more steps to fix crime.

coherence

Link ideas with more smooth ties. use words like 'first', 'then', 'also', 'but' to guide the reader.

evidence

Use more examples from more places, not only one country. This will make the point stronger.

structure

Make the ending stronger by restating the main idea and giving a final thought or hope.

structure

Clear goal at the start and a plan with causes and fixes.

content

Two main ideas with a closing paragraph.

coherence

Some good linking words are used.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

271 words

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The crime among teenagers has increased dramatically in many countries Discuss some possible reasons for this increase and suggest solutions

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Some believe that professionals, such as doctors and engineers, should be required to work in the country where they did their training. They should be free to work in other countries. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Should long-term job seekers in receipt of government benefits be made to do voluntary work so that they give something back to the community?

Improvements in health, education and trade are essential for the development of poorer nations. However, the governments of richer nations should take more responsibility for helping the poorer nations in such areas. To what extent do you agree?

Doing an enjoyable activity with a child can develop better skill and more creative than reading to what extent do you agree or disagree use reason and specific example for to explain your answer.

Some people see sport as no more than a leisure activity, others, however, believe that it is important for society. Discuss both views and give your opinion.