IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

How do advertisers use psychology to sell products? Many advertisers use psychology to persuade people to buy things. Write about how they do this and whether it is ethical.

In recent years, the advertising industry has used a lot of psychological tricks to persuade people to buy new products
Linking Words
such
Punctuation problem
, such
show examples
 as artificial demand or emotional appeal.
Although
Linking Words
 boosting sales is a legitimate aim, I strongly believe that nowadays marketing methods are unethical enough to be questioned.
To begin
Linking Words
 with, one of the most well-known psychological strategies is creating an artificial demand
around
Change preposition
for
show examples
 a
brand new
Use the right word
brand-new
show examples
 product. Slogans like “
last
Linking Words
 offer” or “only today” can play on consumers’ feelings and a fear of missing an opportunity.
As a result
Linking Words
, lots of people make impulse purchases and buy unnecessary things, developing consumerism in society.
For example
Linking Words
, online schools
such
Linking Words
 as Skillbox, XYZschool and others often rely on
this
Linking Words
 tactic to persuade people to buy their services.
This
Linking Words
 is what is called
like
Change preposition
apply
show examples
human’s
Check wording
human
show examples
 feelings.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, another manipulative strategy is an emotionally
appealing
Replace the word
appeal to people
show examples
 and
building
Wrong verb form
build
show examples
 an
associating
Replace the word
association
show examples
 between a product and people’s fond memories. Marketers often link their brand with sustainable values like
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
family, love, and childhood to force
community
Correct article usage
the community
show examples
 to use their service and buy their device.
For instance
Linking Words
, if a certain company is associated with the new year,
then
Linking Words
 most
family
Fix the agreement mistake
families
show examples
 will pay them during
this
Linking Words
 season. In fact, Coca-Cola exploit the new year theme to sell a lot of bottles seasonally.
This
Linking Words
 type of promotion is very powerful, especially toward the very impressionable group of
population
Correct article usage
the population
show examples
,
such
Linking Words
 as children, which makes
this
Linking Words
 group very vulnerable to deceptive tactics. Considering all the above, whilst advertisers still try to justify their promotional methods, I
am
Verb problem
apply
show examples
completely believe
that
Linking Words
is
Correct pronoun usage
it is
show examples
 unethical to play with people’s vulnerabilities and emotions.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

grammar
Fix grammar so ideas are clear. Check verb form and noun use.
structure
Make one idea per paragraph with a clear start sentence (topic sentence).
lexis
Use only short, common words and short sentences. Avoid long, hard words.
content
Give clear links between idea and example. Explain how the example proves the point.
task
Be sure to answer the question in a clear way and keep your view to the end.
structure
You show your view on the topic in the start and end.
cohesion
You use some sign words that help flow.
content
There are two main ideas that a reader can see.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: