IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

Overpopulation is the world's most serious environmental problem. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

With the passage of time, the total number of people on
Earth
Use synonyms
 is increasing, eventually leading to
overpopulation
Use synonyms
.
This
Linking Words
 issue has been widely regarded as the most crucial environmental problem in both developed and developing countries. I strongly agree with
this
Linking Words
 view because
overpopulation
Use synonyms
contribute
Correct subject-verb agreement
contributes
show examples
 to severe environmental degradation. First and foremost, the inevitable rise in population strains the environment, compromising its ability to perform vital functions.
This
Linking Words
 is mostly because higher demand for resources requires more extraction and consumption, which exceeds the
Earth
Use synonyms
's ability to support people sustainably.
For instance
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, the total area of tropical forests in Indonesia has significantly declined by about 40%,
due to
Linking Words
 the clearance of large sections for agricultural land to meet people's daily needs.
Consequently
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, the area for absorbing air pollutants will decrease, leading to an increase in air pollution that negatively impacts human health.
Furthermore
Linking Words
,
overpopulation
Use synonyms
 is generating an increasing amount of waste.
This
Linking Words
 has a direct impact on the environment, particularly through land and water pollution. In developing countries,
for example
Linking Words
, many poor households live near rivers. They often throw their rubbish into the water and still use it for daily needs. In
such
Linking Words
 cases, the rapid growth of the population not only burdens the
Earth
Use synonyms
 but
also
Linking Words
 causes suffering for humans and other living beings within it. In conclusion,
overpopulation
Use synonyms
 is indeed the most serious environmental problem as it accelerates deforestation, pollution, and waste generation. Unless effective measures are taken, the
Earth
Use synonyms
 will struggle to sustain life, and both humans and other living beings will continue to suffer the consequences.

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grammar
Fix grammar: change 'overpopulation contribute' to 'overpopulation contributes'.
content
Give more than one clear example for each point and check facts.
lexical
Keep words simple and use common words rather than hard terms.
task response
Show a small opposite view, then give your view again.
coherence
Use more linking words to tie ideas together, like 'in addition', 'however', 'as a result'.
task response
The writer takes a clear stance from the start.
coherence
The essay has a clear shape: intro, body, and conclusion.
content
Examples are used to support points.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • exacerbating
  • finite resources
  • environmental degradation
  • biodiversity
  • greenhouse gas emissions
  • sustainable consumption
  • habitat loss
  • family planning
  • renewable energy
  • technological advancements
  • resource management
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