Many children have become habitual about excessively using mobile applications day and night. Why do you think this is so? What parents can do to avoid this situation declining further?

there
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There
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is now daout these days phone applications
become
Wrong verb form
are becoming
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populier
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popular
and with children in
partuculir
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particular
.
in
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In
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this
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essay,
i
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I
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will set up what
i
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I
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agree and disagree
in
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with in
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terms of
this
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trend. To
began
Wrong verb form
begin
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with, mobile
app
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apps
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is
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are
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extremely
impotant
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important
for
new
Correct article usage
the new
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generation
and
Punctuation problem
, and
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you can not
evert
Verb problem
ignore
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that fact even if you dislike
this
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information.
therfore
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Therefore
, using
benifit
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beneficial
applications is
cursual
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crucial
for
childern
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children
in terms of teaching them how to connect with
anator
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other
people and how to handle
with
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apply
show examples
issues.
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for
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For
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example, the
fuature
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future
it
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apply
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will be everything
automited
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automated
and
while
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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using that form
their
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from their
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childhood, that will help them
out
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apply
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to be
more smooth
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smoother
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when
becmoing
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becoming
employees.
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this
Fix capitalization
This
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is one of the advantages from my
prespective
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perspective
.
However
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, using mobile applications day and night
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
will
effect
Use the right word
affect
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on
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apply
show examples
their life in many different ways, and one of the ways that will
effect
Wrong verb form
be affected
show examples
is
studing
Correct your spelling
studying
.One of the
teacher
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teachers
show examples
told me that he has a student who was very good
then
Linking Words
he noticed that his performance
has been
Wrong verb form
had
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chenaged
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changed
and become worse.
so
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So
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he
sit
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sits
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with him and
ask
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asks
show examples
him why you have
been
Verb problem
apply
show examples
changed and you
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
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not
foucing
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focusing
anymore?
his
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His
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answer was that he is playing games on his phone day and night. 
in
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In
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conucltion
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conclusion
,
i
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I
show examples
beleive
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believe
that if we try to control our children and
monotoring
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monitor
them
.
Punctuation problem
,
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that will help
alot
Correct your spelling
a lot
.
and
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And
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we should balance. not taking their mobile and
do
Verb problem
apply
show examples
not
let
Wrong verb form
letting
show examples
them play for all the time.
the
Fix capitalization
The
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best way is
that
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apply
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to
resticted
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restrict
them with
Correct article usage
a specifc
show examples
specifc
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specific
time.

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task response
Be clear about your view in the intro. State what you think and then say why. Give two small reasons and one simple plan that parents can use.
coherence and cohesion
Make your ideas fit in three clear parts: first, a short opening; then the body with two ideas; and a short ending. Start each paragraph with a clear topic sentence.
language use
Use simple words and short sentences. Avoid long phrases. Check spelling and grammar so the reader can get your point easy.
task response
The essay tries to talk about why kids use many apps and what to do.
coherence and cohesion
There is a sense of order with an opening, body, and conclusion.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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