Some people think parents should focus on children’s physical health, and helping them with mental health is unnecessary. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

It is widely believed that some individuals suppose mom and dad should concentrate on their
children
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's
physiological
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physical
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health
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, and ignore
an
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apply
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the important role of mental
well- being
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well-being
show examples
. Personally, I can neither completely agree nor disagree with
this
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statement for a variety of reasons. I partly agree that training physical
health
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brings many benefits for
children
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. The main reason is that
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focus
Replace the word
focusing
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on physique helps build up muscles, improves their stamina and increases metabolism.
This
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means that focusing on physical condition can help prevent pathogens and enhance strength.
Children
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's fitness can be improved with
simple
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a simple
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method
,
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;
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in fact, many scientists report that doing fitness routines can prevent the body from diseases
such
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as obesity, cardiovascular
pathology
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disease
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, and lower heart attack risk.
For example
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, the easiest way to stay fit is jogging. During
this
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practice, our body burns
fats
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fat
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to provide enough energy for movement.
Therefore
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, jogging makes the percentage of body fat lower and reduces obesity risk.
On the other hand
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, I disagree with the viewpoint that parents should not only pay attention to physical
well- being
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well-being
show examples
but
also
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focus
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on mental
health
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.
This
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is because
,
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apply
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children
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with good psychological
health
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can concentrate on the lesson better than
children
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with poor mental
condition
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health
show examples
. In fact, the quality of sleep has improved in
children
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with positive physiological
condition
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conditions
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. A particularly good example here is Professor Ali Asani from Harvard University, who has
made
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conducted
show examples
the newest research on psychiatric and. He concluded that mental
health
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is necessary because positive thinking helps reduce the concentration of cortisol, which is known as a stress hormone.
As a result
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,
children
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will have better performance at school if they have good mental
health
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. In conclusion,
although
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many parents
focus
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on
children
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's physical training and ignore mental
health
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, I'm convinced that both mental
well- being
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well-being
show examples
and physiological
well- being
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well-being
show examples
are
importantSome
Correct your spelling
important
people think parents should
focus
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on
children
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’s physical
health
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, and helping them with mental
health
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is unnecessary. To what extent do you agree or disagree? for
children
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's development.

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task response
Say a clear view in the first line and stay with it through the essay.
coherence
Make one idea in a paragraph with a short line that tells what it is about, then add a small fact or example.
coherence
Link your parts with easy words like also, but, for example, and use a good end that repeats your view.
content
Choose facts that are true and easy to prove. Do not rely on unknown ideas.
language
Check grammar and spelling. Use small, short sentences.
content
The essay talks about both sides of the topic.
content
It tries to give example in support of points.
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