IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 2

An increasing number of people want to buy clothes , shoes and other products by famous international brands Why is it ? Do you think it is a positive or a negative development ?

People
Use synonyms
 like to brag about everything
Punctuation problem
, specially
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specially
Use the right word
especially
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 about
brands
Use synonyms
,
So
Fix capitalization
so
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 they intend to buy clothes only from
famous
Punctuation problem
famous,
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 fashionable
brands
Use synonyms
. The positive things about it
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
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,
Punctuation problem
apply
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That
Fix capitalization
that
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people
Use synonyms
 actually
cares
Correct subject-verb agreement
care
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 about how they look, and a lot of
people
Use synonyms
takes
Correct subject-verb agreement
take
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 it
for
Change preposition
as
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 a job,
such
Linking Words
 as a fashion designer, model, or
an
Correct article usage
apply
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influencer
,
Punctuation problem
.
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 There
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
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 a lot of great talents discovered by fashion and
brands
Use synonyms
. The negative side of the
brands
Use synonyms
 is, That not everyone could afford to buy them, and if they buy normal clothes from an unknown
brands
Use synonyms
people
Use synonyms
 will judge, and they will be ashamed, study's showed that 49% of the tenagers felt depressed and felt left out, like they don't belong around the
people
Use synonyms
 with great taste in fashion, the truth is if they had money they could do anything, and it's gonna be hard for the parents to see their child going through depression just because they can't afford to buy them what they want.
for
Change preposition
In
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 my personal opinion, I see the famous
brands
Use synonyms
 are amazing, but
people
Use synonyms
 shouldn't judge other
people
Use synonyms
 for their clothes
but
Punctuation problem
, but
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 judge them by who they are as a person.

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structure
Add a short intro that says what you will discuss and your view.
structure
End with a clear conclusion that sums up your view.
grammar
Fix grammar and make sentences shorter; avoid long run on sentences.
grammar
Check spelling and use simple words you know well (for example 'teenagers').
content
Give more real examples or facts and explain why they show your view.
content
Try to give a balanced view with both good and bad points and link them to your view.
content balance
You show both sides of the issue.
stance
Your view is clear at the end.
tone
You use simple words that are easy to read.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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