Some people think that competition at work, at school and in daily life is a good thing. Others believe that we should try to cooperate more, rather than competing against each other. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

There is no denying the fact that our world has become competitive.
While
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it is a commonly held belief that we should compete throughout the day, there is
also
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an argument that
instead
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of competing, we should collaborate and assist each other.
This
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essay will analyse
this
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topic from both points of view and express my opinion. On the one hand, competition among people creates creativity.
In other words
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, people must compete with others to create new innovations in our world.
In addition
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, our development and the advanced technology that we have now are
due to
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the competition among
companies
Use synonyms
.
For example
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, because of the race in recent years among tech
companies
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, we developed in several sectors,
such
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as hospitals, entertainment, and social media.
On the other hand
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, we need to collaborate with each other , which will lead us to save time and money. It is
also
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possible to say that
companies
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and individuals need each other to complete their weaknesses.
Moreover
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, the
companies
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that compete with each other assist each other with their strengths and weaknesses, which will lead them to save an immense amount of money and time. To illustrate that a 2005 study in the United States found that if tech
companies
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collaborate with each other in the future, we will enhance our sectors rapidly more than 50 years ago. In conclusion, there are no easy answers to
this
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question. On balance,
however
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, I tend to believe that we must compete with each other in an appropriate way , healthy competition. That will create more inventors in the future and create advanced technology to solve our issues these days.

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coherence cohesion
Use clear links to show the flow from one idea to the next. Try words like also, but, so and then.
task achievement
Give real examples for each main idea and show how they prove your view.
coherence cohesion
Make one main idea per paragraph. Start with the idea and end with a line that restates the view.
task achievement
Keep sentences short and simple. Avoid long or odd phrases.
structure
The essay has a clear plan to discuss both sides and to give an opinion.
position
The writer states a view in the end, which shows a clear stance.
content
Some good ideas on how work and tech help progress.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • innovation
  • productivity
  • excel
  • outperform
  • advancements
  • academic standards
  • work ethic
  • stress
  • anxiety
  • unhealthy rivalries
  • harmonious
  • supportive
  • collaborative learning
  • social skills
  • communication skills
  • sense of community
  • collective goals
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