IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

Some people believe that professionals, such as doctors and engineers, should be required to work in the country where they did their training. Others believe they should be free to work in another country if they wish. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Some people think that professionals, like doctors and engineers, should be required to serve in the same
country
Use synonyms
 where they were educated. Others believe that they should have the liberty to work in another place if they desire it. Personally, I support the second group's opinion. The suggestion that professionals should labour in their homeland can have many motives. One of these motives may be the fact that the
country
Use synonyms
 is facing socio-economic problems and needs these individuals to keep the economy from collapsing.
As a result
Linking Words
, the idea of required labour might be introduced and encouraged.
However
Linking Words
, it may not yield the results that one imagines. As an example, in a certain Southeast Asian
country
Use synonyms
,
this
Linking Words
 method was used to stop the high immigration rates for white-collar workers.
However
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
 idea backfired and resulted in the immigration of students who didn't even want to pursue their studies in their homeland, let alone get a job there. Allowing doctors and engineers to go and experience working abroad can produce many positive results. If these groups gather the knowledge of foreign communities and come back home to expand
this
Linking Words
 newfound information, a
country
Use synonyms
 will surely flourish. Programs that allow people in white-collar jobs to go abroad and gain a new perspective on the world can greatly contribute to
this
Linking Words
. And if said programs are provided by their homeland, they'll want to pay back
this
Linking Words
 favour and be of service. All in all, some folks believe that educated individuals must work in their home,
while
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 others think they should be allowed to work abroad. Without a doubt, I agree that we should let these people go to foreign countries so that they may learn more and come back to aid their birthplace.

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Task response and language
Your essay has a yes and a no, and you state your own view. It would be stronger if you have a clear topic sentence in each paragraph and if you use simple, real words.
Coherence and cohesion
Link ideas with easy words at the start of sentences, like first, also, but, and finally. Make each idea lead to the next.
Language accuracy
Some parts are long or stiff. Use short, plain words and short sentences.
Content
Clear view with two sides.
Structure
End repeats the view and fits the topic.
Content
Shows idea of learning and help to home place.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • professionals
  • doctors
  • engineers
  • required
  • training
  • home country
  • cultural
  • linguistic
  • advantages
  • economic impact
  • free
  • another country
  • globalization
  • international collaboration
  • improving
  • skills
  • knowledge
  • experience
  • opinion
What to do next:
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