Some people use social media to keep in touch with other people and news event. Do you think advantages of this technology outweigh the disadvantage?

In today's
modernization
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modernisation
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, the
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technology
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rise of technological
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advancement
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advancements
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rise as the output of
digitalization
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digitalisation
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. Many
people
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have
been
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apply
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used
technology
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as their main
tools
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tool
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to connect with others
as well as
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to access anything online,
such
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us
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as
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news
event
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events
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. Those technologies
,
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apply
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can bring both advantages and disadvantages to today's globalisation. The rapid growth of social
media
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platforms
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can bring so many cyber frauds and crimes because of the lack of
the
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apply
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digital security and the accessibility of the
platforms
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itself
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themselves
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. For
examples
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example
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, nowadays
people
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can easily
do
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commit
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the
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apply
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online financial
frauds
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fraud
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through e-commerce and other online trading
platforms
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.
Moreover
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, the inclination of social
media
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can erode the connection with
people
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around us because we're likely to be more
focus
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focused
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on our
gadget
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gadgets
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.
Conversely
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, the benefits of those technologies can outweigh the drawbacks if we can manage
it
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them
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properly. Any social
media
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platforms
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and digital applications can
rise
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improve
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job's
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job
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efficiency because
through
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, through
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technology
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, we can access anything online, even nowadays, the digital
platforms
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for goods trading are commonly used
enabling
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, enabling
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people
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to buy anything they need without any burden.
For instance
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, the e-commerce applications that enable us to buy anything online
even
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, even
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from other
region
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regions
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and
country
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countries
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.
Additionally
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, we
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also can
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can also
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keep in touch with other
people
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and access news
event
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events
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immediately
which
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, which
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can help us
navigating
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navigate
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and
tracking
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track
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our daily activities efficiently.
To sum up
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, I believe that the benefits of social
media
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as the output of today's
technology
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advancement can outweigh the drawbacks if we can control and use it properly. With good digital management, we can use those digital
platforms
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as
the
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apply
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tools to make our activities easier. With the mindful management,
technology
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can help us to
connected
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connect
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with others online without
erode
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eroding
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our relationship with
people
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around us.
Moreover
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, social
media
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and other digital
platforms
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can
rise
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raise
show examples
our productivity in terms of online trading.

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Task response
Give a clear view at the start or end of the essay and keep to one side of the topic.
Coherence and cohesion
Use more link words to show how ideas connect.
Task response
Add simple, exact examples to show your point.
Coherence and cohesion
Keep one idea in one paragraph and end with a short summary.
Structure
The essay has an intro, body, and conclusion.
Content
It shows a effort to discuss both sides of the topic.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • real-time updates
  • global connectivity
  • professional networking
  • fake news
  • misinformation
  • social media addiction
  • mental health issues
  • privacy concerns
  • personal information
  • viral content
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