IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3

Some people think that foreign visitors should be charged more than locals when they visits culture and tourist attractions. To what extent, do you agree or disagree

In recent
Rephrase
Recently
show examples
,
traveling
Use the right word
travelling
show examples
 is not a difficult thing for people.
In
Change preposition
As
show examples
that
Correct determiner usage
a
show examples
 result, people can go
around
Rephrase
apply
show examples
anywhere.
However
Linking Words
,too
much
Fix the agreement mistake
many
show examples
 foreign
vistors
Correct your spelling
visitors
 will bring more
disavantages
Correct your spelling
disadvantages
 than
locals
Use synonyms
 when they visit
culture
Replace the word
cultural
show examples
 and tourist attractions. I agree that. In fact
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
all
Correct determiner usage
apply
show examples
, foreign
visitors
Use synonyms
 will not know more
local
Change preposition
about local
show examples
 cultures than
locals
Use synonyms
.
For instance
Linking Words
, if you go to Japan.You will discover that their
recycle
Replace the word
recycling
show examples
 culture
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
show examples
 very difficult to follow. It is hard to put your
rubbishes
Correct subject-verb agreement
rubbish
show examples
to
Change preposition
in to
show examples
 right
recycle
Replace the word
recycling
show examples
 box.
However
Linking Words
, if you are
locals
Use synonyms
,
that is
Linking Words
 easy to follow the
recycle
Replace the word
recycling
show examples
stype
Correct your spelling
type
. Since you have learned the
recycle
Replace the word
recycling
show examples
 system when you
start
Wrong verb form
started
show examples
 your school life. So in that
case
Punctuation problem
case,
show examples
 foreign
visitors
Use synonyms
 should be
changed
Use the right word
charged
show examples
 more because they got
fine
Correct article usage
a fine
show examples
.
Then
Linking Words
, foreign
visitors
Use synonyms
 use different money. They do not have ideals for how much they should pay.
For example
Linking Words
, some
mainlands
Use the right word
mainlanders
show examples
 visit
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
Hong Kong. They do not know how
much
Fix the agreement mistake
many
show examples
 coats they can buy
a
Change preposition
with a
show examples
bottle of water. So some
shop
Fix the agreement mistake
shops
show examples
 will increase the
piece
Check wording
price
show examples
 at tourist attractions to earn more money. But if you were
locals
Use synonyms
, you
have
Wrong verb form
would be
show examples
 full of experiences at shopping and have
variety
Correct article usage
a variety
show examples
 of ways to buy a discount product.That will
cheaper
Verb problem
be cheaper
show examples
 than foreign
visitors
Use synonyms
 brought. In the end,
i
Fix capitalization
I
show examples
 agree that foreign
visitors
Use synonyms
 should be
changed
Use the right word
charged
show examples
 more than
locals
Use synonyms
not
Punctuation problem
, not
show examples
 only
as
Change preposition
because
show examples
locals
Use synonyms
 know more
their
Change preposition
about their
show examples
 culture
but
Punctuation problem
, but
show examples
also
Linking Words
Use synonyms
locals
Correct word choice
because locals
show examples
 have more ways to find
discount
Fix the agreement mistake
discounts
show examples
.
However
Linking Words
, foreign
visitors
Use synonyms
 can save their money like
locals
Use synonyms
 if they do more research.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

structure
Make a clear view in the first paragraph and restate it in the last paragraph.
content
Add one idea per paragraph and give a simple example for each.
coherence
Use simple linking words to show order and contrast.
language
Check grammar and spelling so the meaning is easy to see.
idea
The writer tries to state a clear view on the issue.
example
Some real life example are given.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: