The most important aim of science should be to improve people’s lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Improving
people
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's
lives
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indeed depends on
science
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, and the most important purpose of
science
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should be to improve everyone's
lives
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. I strongly agree with
this
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view because
science
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can improve an individual's
life
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and
also
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solve the issues about the environment.
Firstly
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,
science
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plays a vital role in the health sector.
In other words
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,
people
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can live longer or cure their diseases with the help of
science
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because it allows doctors to detect diseases through advanced scanning and blood analysis.
In addition
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,
science
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can save
lives
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by creating new medicines.
For example
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, scientists researched and developed vaccines to protect patients who suffer from COVID-19 during the pandemic.
Moreover
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, scientists invented the pacemaker, a small device that helps
people
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with heart problems by regulating their heartbeat.
Therefore
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, every individual’s
life
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depends on
science
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.
Secondly
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,
science
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leads to modern technology to facilitate everyone’s
life
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in daily communication, and helps
people
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understand climate change.
For instance
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, nowadays,
people
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around the world can access the internet, which helps them to communicate with each other wherever they live in the world.
Furthermore
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, scientists can save
lives
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by enlightening
people
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to be aware of climate change. To illustrate, in Japan, most civilians’
lives
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had been saved by informing them ahead about the environmental issues
such
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as storms or earthquakes.
Thus
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,
science
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is really crucial in daily
life
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.
To conclude
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, I completely agree that the most important purpose of
science
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should be to enhance
people
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’s
lives
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because
people
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indeed depend on it, and
science
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can help to improve
lives
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in many ways.

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task response
State your view in the first line of the essay to show the task is clear.
structure
Use one idea per paragraph and start with a topic sentence to show the point you will make.
coherence
Link ideas with short, common words and keep transitions simple so the flow is easy to follow.
content
Give exact examples and explain how they back your view.
language
Check your word choice. Some long words like enlighten can be hard. Use plain words that most readers know.
conclusion
Finish with a short restate of your view and a quick sum up of your points.
strength
Clear view and steady flow of idea from health to tech and life.
strength
Good use of examples like vaccines and the internet to back ideas.
strength
Nice essay form with intro, body and conclusion.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • crucial role
  • enhancing
  • quality of human life
  • advancements
  • medicine
  • healthcare
  • scientific research
  • solving societal problems
  • improving living standards
  • global issues
  • climate change
  • food scarcity
  • technological advancements
  • limitations
  • negative consequences
  • ethical considerations
  • sustainability
  • environmental preservation
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