IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Some people say that history offers no practical benefit to society while others claim that history teaches us to understand the present. Discuss both views and give your own opinion .

History
Use synonyms
 may or may not offer practical benefits to society
as
Change preposition
in
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to understand
Verb problem
understanding
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 the present moment.
History
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 shares all the
events
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 in life
Linking Words
such
Punctuation problem
, such
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 as political
events
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, religious
events
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 and scientific
events
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...
Punctuation problem
,
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etc.
we
Fix capitalization
We
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 learn it from schools or from our family members telling us about our great grandparents.
that
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That
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 itself is a form of
history
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. Some say that
history
Use synonyms
 doesn’t benefit us in many ways. They might say
why
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Why
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 should I learn about ‘how
this
Linking Words
 happened’ or ‘why it happened’ and ‘who killed who’
these
Fix capitalization
These
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 are not important in society
and
Punctuation problem
, and
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that
Correct word choice
apply
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we should not look at the past and do the same as our ancestors. We should be our own person and make our own
history
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.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, others say that to be better and stronger than
before
Punctuation problem
before,
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 we should look at the
history
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 of our people and learn from their mistakes and successes and get to understand how everything evolved around us. Who was the mastermind behind it? These questions intrigue them In my opinion, we should learn about our
history
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 so we can improve it and add more to it and for
the
Correct article usage
apply
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future generations to do the same. It’s the only way we can evolve as humans.
if
Fix capitalization
If
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 we had not looked through in the
past
Punctuation problem
past,
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 we would have still been
cave men
Use the right word
cavemen
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 who only worried about surviving. In summary, we ought to look at
history
Use synonyms
 to learn from it and add our own scientific discoveries to improve it
not
Punctuation problem
, not
show examples
 to copy it nonsensically

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task
To be strong for task, add one clear point for each view and end with your view. Keep your idea in a simple, full line.
coherence
Make links between ideas with short, easy link words. Start each paragraph with a clear idea.
examples
Give one or two clear small examples for each idea to show how history helps or hurts now.
content
You show both sides of the view.
argument
Your opinion is clear at the end.
structure
You use contrast words like On the other hand and In my opinion.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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