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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The bar chart below shows the number of cars per 1000 people in 5 Europeon countries and compares with Europeon average

The bar chart below shows the number of cars per 1000 people in 5 Europeon countries and compares with Europeon average
The bar chart compares how many
cars
Use synonyms
owned
Verb problem
are owned
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each
Change preposition
by each
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 1000 people in 5 European
countries
Use synonyms
 in 3 years and compared to
European
Correct article usage
the European
show examples
 average.
Overall
Linking Words
, the
number
Use synonyms
 of
cars
Use synonyms
were
Correct subject-verb agreement
was
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 generally increased between
country
Use synonyms
 1 and
country
Use synonyms
 5.
In addition
Linking Words
, the highest result was in 2015 among
average
Correct article usage
the average
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 of 5
countries
Use synonyms
. As the chart shows, in the
country
Use synonyms
one was
Verb problem
,
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 the lowest
number
Use synonyms
 of vehicles
compared
Verb problem
was compared
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 to other
countries
Use synonyms
, in the range of between 300 and 400. Regarding
to
Change preposition
apply
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country
Use synonyms
 two, the quantity of
cars
Use synonyms
were
Correct subject-verb agreement
was
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 around 500 with little fluctuations throughout the period. Turning into
country
Use synonyms
 three, it experienced
steady
Correct article usage
a steady
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 decrease from 700 to just below 600 within 10 years.
By
Linking Words
contrast
Punctuation problem
contrast,
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 the
number
Use synonyms
 of
cars
Use synonyms
 in
country
Use synonyms
 4 remained unchanged at 700 in all years. Moving into trend of
country
Use synonyms
 5 , it generally increased, despite of slight decrease to 850 in 2005 , it reached just below 1000 in 2015 . Regarding the average
number
Use synonyms
 of
cars
Use synonyms
 in five
countries
Use synonyms
 , the
result
Fix the agreement mistake
results
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 between 2005 and 2009 were similar, in the range of between 650 and 640.
However
Linking Words
, the highest
number
Use synonyms
 of
cars
Use synonyms
were
Correct subject-verb agreement
was
show examples
 in
2015
Punctuation problem
2015,
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 with just below 800 .

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words cars, countries, number, country with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "compares" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 5 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "decrease" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "just below" was used 3 times.
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