Nowadays more and more people have household appliances, such as refrigerators or washing machines. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

In
this
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contemporary era, the number of people
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
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now adapting to have various household appliances, which include refrigerators or washing machines,
that
Correct pronoun usage
which
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I believe is a positive development in
the
Correct article usage
apply
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society.
This
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essay will elucidate the positive impact of
this
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statement in the subsequent paragraphs. To commence with, there is a rise in the leisure
time
Use synonyms
which can be
utilized
Use the right word
utilised
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in other crucial things in
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life
Punctuation problem
life,
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as we use more and more machines for our domestic work.
In other words
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, these appliances are faster when used compared to doing these house chores manually, which ultimately leaves the user with more spare
time
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that they can use in learning new skills and enhancing their knowledge. To exemplify,
instead
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of washing clothes by hand
Punctuation problem
,
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they can use a washing machine
and
Punctuation problem
, and
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in the meantime, they can learn a language
while
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clothes are still washing in the machine.
Hence
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, they will get more
time
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to develop themself.
Moreover
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,
this
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will help in reducing stress and will provide mental peace. To explain, in
this
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modern world, humankind is living a stressful
life
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due to
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its hectic schedule
and
Punctuation problem
, and
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these applications help them to get relief by reducing their work
time
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and making
life
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more convenient.
For instance
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, people can buy groceries and store them in a freezer
which
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, which
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aids them in avoiding shopping for a
while
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, and they can focus on their work.
Thus
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,
this
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will make them healthier and more productive. To recapitulate ,
this
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essay clearly depicts that these new home technologies assist in the development of humans both mentally and
physically
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physically,
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as they can live a stress-free
life
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and learn new skills, which will boost their level of productivity.

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coherence and cohesion
Improve link with clear flow. Use more connect words to show how points fit. Some sentences jump from one idea to another.
task response
Give a clear view on the topic at once and stay with it. Add more real ideas or facts to support points.
grammar and word choice
Fix small grammar and word use errors. Use simpler, common words.
strength
The essay states a clear view that appliances are a positive thing.
strength
There are some examples, like washing machine and freezer, to support points.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general
What to do next:
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