IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 2

The char below shows the information about salt intake in the US in 2000

The bar chart compares how much
salt
Use synonyms
 was ingested in the US in 2000.
Overall
Linking Words
, the amount of
salt
Use synonyms
 intake in females
were
Correct subject-verb agreement
was
show examples
 lower compared to males, which was near to
recommended
Correct article usage
the recommended
show examples
 quantity of
salt
Use synonyms
 consumption in adults. Regarding the amount of
salt
Use synonyms
 ingestion among men, it started at 2000 milligrams
in
Change preposition
at
show examples
 the age of under 6 and increased considerably to around 4500 milligrams until the age of 20-49. Despite
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
this
Linking Words
 significant growth, it experienced a moderate decline to 3500 among males
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
 who
aged
Verb problem
were aged
show examples
 sixty and above.
By contrast
Linking Words
, the volume of
salt
Use synonyms
 intake in women started approximately at 1,2 grams among girls
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
 who
aged
Verb problem
were aged
show examples
 under 6 .
However
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
 amount rose to 3 grams and remained unchanged among four age groups who were between 6-11 and 40-60 years old females.
Although
Linking Words
this
Linking Words
 level
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
, it witnessed a slight decrease to 2500
within
Change preposition
among
show examples
 elderly women , who were over sixty years old.

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structure
Use a clear intro that shows what the chart is about. Start with an overview.
accuracy
Be exact with units and numbers. Pick one way to write mg and g and stay with it.
cohesion
Group data clearly by gender, then by age. Use 'while' or 'in contrast' to show changes.
grammar
Check grammar and make short, clear sentences. Avoid long, broken phrases.
data
There are many data figures in the text.
structure
There is an attempt to compare both genders.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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