IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 2.5

Government should spend money on railways rather than road.

These days,
transportation
Use synonyms
 has become a lifeline for many
people
Use synonyms
 because the
transportation
Use synonyms
 system has made
traveling
Change the spelling
travelling
show examples
 easier than
the
Change preposition
in the
show examples
 past.Some individuals believe that the administration should invest assets in the
constructions
Fix the agreement mistake
construction
show examples
 of railways
instead
Linking Words
 of highways. I completely disagree, and in
this
Linking Words
 essay, I will support my opinion with examples. First of all, many
people
Use synonyms
 use roads
for moving
Change preposition
to move
show examples
 from one place to another. By
this
Linking Words
, I mean that in
this
Linking Words
 advanced era, everyone has their own vehicle. Humans use their convenience for
transportation
Use synonyms
. If the public uses their own mode of
transport
Punctuation problem
transport,
show examples
 they reach their destination in a timely manner
instead
Linking Words
 of using public transport like trains. Another reason why I disagree is that if the government
utilizes
Change the spelling
utilises
show examples
 money on lane
construction
Use synonyms
 as compared to railways, inhabitants can save their time.
For example
Linking Words
, by constructing different tracks,
people
Use synonyms
 can use multiple routes rather than a typical railway infrastructure.
Additionally
Linking Words
, highway
construction
Use synonyms
 helps
people
Use synonyms
 in
the
Correct pronoun usage
their
show examples
 mode of
transportation
Use synonyms
. In conclusion,
although
Linking Words
 it is a common belief that authorities must spend finances on highway
construction
Use synonyms
 rather than on railroad
construction
Use synonyms
.I believe that the government should spend expenditures on road
construction
Use synonyms
 rather than
railways
Change preposition
on railways
show examples
. Personally, I think that by constructing
roads
Punctuation problem
roads,
show examples
 life has become easy.

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weakness
Answer the question directly. The task asks if the government should spend on railways; you argued for roads. Pick a side and give clear points.
tip
Make each paragraph have one main idea. Start with a short sentence (topic sentence) and then give one or two simple examples.
tip
Use short, easy sentences and fix small grammar mistakes. This helps readers see your point.
strength
The essay uses simple words and has a basic plan.
strength
Link words like First of all, Another reason, In conclusion help flow.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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