IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Some people believe that technology has improved our lives, while others think it has caused more problems. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

There is a debate over how
technology
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 can impact the lifestyles of
people
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 , with some saying that it makes
people
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's lives easier,
while
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 others argue that
technology
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 leads to various dangers. In my opinion,
while
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 technologies have some negative sides, their development can create better outcomes in some sectors.
To begin
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 with,
technology
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 is
undeniable
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undeniably
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 significant to our lives as
they
Correct pronoun usage
it
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make
Correct subject-verb agreement
makes
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 the distance close,
as well as
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 some technological devices can save time by making our duties easier. With the regular usage or application of digital devices, many both
miner
Use the right word
minor
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 and
measure
Replace the word
measuring
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 chores are done rapidly in
short
Correct article usage
a short
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 period. To take an example in medicine, serious illnesses are diagnosed much earlier and more accurately with the wide usage of technological tools,
it
Correct pronoun usage
which
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 leads to feasible recoveries in an unexpectedly quick
phrase
Use the right word
phase
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.
Therefore
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, humanity can get huge benefits
with
Change preposition
from
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 the advancement of varied technologies and their regular application.
On the other hand
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,
although
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technology
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 has many benefits, it
also
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 creates various problems related to our lives.Constant usage of
technology
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 has
negative
Correct article usage
a negative
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 influence on
people
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's health as well.
For instance
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, light and radiation emitted from
technology
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causes
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cause
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 neurological diseases, and
this
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 may
also
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 make
people
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 aggressive
while
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 they are living in their virtual life.
Although
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 different devices can mainly be
helping
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helpful
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 assistants during
working
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work
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, they may
also
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 indirectly cause detrimental impacts on our bodies. In conclusion, an evolving society and the government depend on
technology
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. If new
technology
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 is created, the world will develop. Living comforts increase , and all society will be happy. More
people
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 can spend more time on themselves if they delegate their tasks to
technology
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.

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language
Make the main idea easy to see. Use short, clear sentences.
development
Add real and small examples for each point.
coherence
Link thoughts with simple words like 'first', 'also', 'but', 'however'.
task response
End with a clear view that matches what you say in the body.
content
You show both sides of the topic.
structure
There is a clear plan: intro, body, and ending.
content
You give some facts about health and time.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • streamlined processes
  • constant connectivity
  • learning and adaptation
  • enhance convenience
  • accessible services
  • remote work
  • flexible schedules
  • work-life balance
  • evolving nature
  • 'always on' culture
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