IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

IELTS 8 - Exam 2 - Nowadays the way many people interact with each other has changed because of technology. In what ways has technology affected the types of relationships people make? Has this become a positive or negative development?

In
this
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 contemporary scenario, owing to the advanced technology, a considerable alteration has been observed in
the
Correct article usage
apply
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terms of
intraction
Correct your spelling
interaction
 by the individuals. I personally believe that technology
intend
Correct subject-verb agreement
intends
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 to
strenghten
Correct your spelling
strengthen
 the relationship regardless
the
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of the
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 distance and allows
the
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apply
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people to do multitasking.
That is
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 why
,
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apply
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 it is a
favorable
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favourable
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 change.
To begin
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 with, in-person
meetings
Use synonyms
has
Correct subject-verb agreement
have
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 been
repleced
Correct your spelling
replaced
 by virtual
meetings
Use synonyms
 in nearly every field, but the significant change has been seen in daily casual interactions. To explain it, nowadays, the time
spend
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spent
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 by
the
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apply
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individuals
for
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to
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 get
togather
Correct your spelling
together
 or
performing
Wrong verb form
perform
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 outdoor activities is changing sharply, and has turned into digital
meetings
Use synonyms
 and games.
For instance
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, in spite of
Use synonyms
meetings
Use the right word
meeting
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 friends at a cafe or going out for
walk
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a walk
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, most of the masses
prefers
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prefer
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to connect on
videocall
Use the right word
video call
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 or play computer games,
such
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 as PUBG, Freefire, etc.
On the other hand
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,
It
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it
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 has far more immediate and positive impact on the
well being
Use the right word
well-being
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 of
relationship
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relationships
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 among the masses.
Hence
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,
It is
Verb problem
it
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 has increased virtual connection, which often assists not only
to
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in
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 performing daily
task
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tasks
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 but
also
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to maintain
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in maintaining
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 the bonding with loved ones simultaneously.
In other words
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,
while
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 being occupied with office work and other home chores,
the
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apply
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people are busy with their work and
usualy
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usually
have
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apply
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lack of free time to schedule
in-person
Correct article usage
an in-person
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 gathering. In
this
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 case, it offers a miraculous opportunity to
intract
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interact
 with loved ones
while
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 engaging with their work with the help of social media apps,
such
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 as
,
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apply
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facebook
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Facebook
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,
instagram
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Instagram
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, and
wharsapp
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WhatsApp
.
For example
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, numerous students who are
studing
Correct your spelling
studying
 abroad
,
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apply
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 often cannot manage conventional gatherings. Thereby, they
remains
Correct subject-verb agreement
remain
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 in touch and communicate with their families through social media applications In conclusion, undoubtedly,
due to
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 modern technology, the way of interaction has entirely changed from casual to professional ,and it is a good indication for the people, as it often
fix
Correct subject-verb agreement
fixes
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 the issue of long distance and shortage of time.

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task response
Make your view clear. Say at the start if you think this change is good or bad and keep this view to the end.
coherence
Give more full links from one idea to the next. Use topic sentences to show the idea of each paragraph.
language
Improve spelling and grammar. Use short, simple sentences.
coherence
Add more facts or clear examples to support points. Explain why the example shows your idea.
task response
Balance the view. Mention both good and bad sides, not only one side.
strength
The essay tries to show how tech can keep people in touch even when they are far.
strength
It gives real ideas like video calls and apps to stay in touch.
strength
There is a clear link to the idea of being busy and still talking with others.

Answer the 'Problem and Solution' topic

Problem-and-solution essays fall naturally into two parts, the first describing and exploring the problem, the second setting out the solution or solutions.

You essay structure should look something like this:

  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – Problems
  • Body paragraph 2 – Solutions
  • Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

  • One of the first problems of the...
  • Another problem that needs to be considered...
  • A possible solution to this problem would be...
  • One immediate practical solution is to...

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • global connectivity
  • social media
  • communication apps
  • virtual relationships
  • instant communication
  • instant gratification
  • telecommuting
  • remote work
  • social dynamics
  • privacy issues
  • trust
  • intimacy
What to do next:
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