IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

The line graph below shows the number of annual visits to Australia by overseas residents. The table below gives information on the country of origin where the visitors came from during 1975 to 2005.

The line graph below shows the number of annual visits to Australia by overseas residents. The table below gives information on the country of origin where the visitors came from during 1975 to 2005.
The chart illustrates the figures of overseas annual
visitors
Use synonyms
 to
Australia
Use synonyms
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
 the table displays data regarding the base country where they came from. As it is observed, the number of
visitors
Use synonyms
 had an increasing trend
dramatically
Rephrase
apply
show examples
during the frame
timw
Correct your spelling
time
. In 1975, the
figures
Check wording
number
show examples
 of people who came
Use synonyms
Australia
Change preposition
to Australia
show examples
 was 10
millions
Fix the agreement mistake
million
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,
while
Linking Words
 it jumped abruptly to over 15
millions
Fix the agreement mistake
million
show examples
just in
Correct word order
in just
show examples
 10 years
which
Punctuation problem
, which
show examples
 is a great
aproach
Correct your spelling
approach
 to 30.
Furthrmore
Correct your spelling
Furthermore
, in 1995 the figures
increased
Punctuation problem
increased,
show examples
 followed by 25. And as it is obvious in
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
2005
Punctuation problem
2005,
show examples
 the annual visits to
Australia
Use synonyms
 reached
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
a peak of above 30
millions
Fix the agreement mistake
million
show examples
. In 1975, the number of
visitors
Use synonyms
 from South Korea and Japan was 2.9 and 3.2
respectively
Punctuation problem
, respectively
show examples
which
Punctuation problem
, which
show examples
enhanced
Verb problem
increased
show examples
 to 9.1 and 12.0 by respect in 2005.
While
Linking Words
 China and the USA
has
Correct subject-verb agreement
have
show examples
 the lowest numbers of
visitors
Use synonyms
 to
Use synonyms
Australia
Punctuation problem
Australia,
show examples
 followed by 0.8 and 1.1 in a row in 2005.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
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Linking words: Add more linking words.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words visitors, australia with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "figures" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "figures" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 3 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • annual visits
  • overseas residents
  • country of origin
  • visitation trends
  • significant increase
  • fluctuations
  • global events
  • economic factors
  • travel restrictions
  • largest contributor
  • diverse countries
  • emerging markets
  • correlation
  • economic ties
  • cultural connections
  • growth in tourist numbers
  • factors contributing
  • data analysis
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