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Writing Samples
Band 7.5

It is important for everyone, including young people, to save money for their future. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

It cannot be denied that
money
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 plays a central role in modern life. In response to
this
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,
people
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, especially the younger generation, should be concerned about their financial security by saving. I completely agree with
this
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 view, as saving helps
people
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 deal with emergency situations and encourages wise spending habits. First and foremost, saving a portion of one’s income can be helpful in unexpected situations. There are plenty of conditions that may occur unexpectedly,
such
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 as illness, house maintenance costs, or the sudden termination of employment. By saving in advance,
people
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 can avoid borrowing
money
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, which often worsens their financial situation. A clear example of
this
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 can be seen in modern society.
According to
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 a recent survey, about 30% of clients of
money
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-lending institutions are individuals who have lost their jobs.
This
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 highlights the importance of having emergency savings.
Furthermore
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, developing the habit of saving
money
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 influences
people
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 to spend
money
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 more wisely.
This
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 is mostly because they learn to manage their daily finances more carefully, which makes them aware of their spending patterns. Once
this
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 practice becomes habitual, individuals are more likely to think twice before purchasing unnecessary items.
For example
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, children who are taught the value of saving prefer to set aside their pocket
money
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 to reach a personal goal,
such
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 as buying books,
instead
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 of spending it on sweets.
That is
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 why saving
money
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 is valuable for building good habits, including discipline and self-control in spending. In conclusion,
it is clear that
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 saving
money
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 brings significant long–term benefits, increasing awareness of the need for emergency funds and encouraging wiser
money
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 management.
Therefore
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,
this
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 idea can be viewed as a positive step towards greater financial security in the future.

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strength
You have a clear view and a good base. Add one more real example or fact to make your point strong.
coherence
Use more link words to show flow from one idea to next. Words like first, also, then, but, finally help a lot.
grammar
Keep to easy gram and short sentence. Watch for tense and plural marks.
structure
In the end, tie the goal to the act of saving. Make the last line about saving money itself.
task reply
Clear stance and steady idea.
content
Good examples that fit the point.
coherence
Reasoning is easy to follow.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • financial security
  • safety net
  • unforeseen circumstances
  • emergencies
  • future investments
  • retirement planning
  • financial discipline
  • habit of saving
  • amassing wealth
  • substantial fund
  • opportunity cost
  • additional income
  • inflation
  • purchasing power
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