IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

The tables below give information about sales of Fairtrade*-labelled tea and pineapples in 2010 and 2015 in five European countries.

The tables below give information about sales of Fairtrade*-labelled tea and pineapples in 2010 and 2015 in five European countries.
THE TABLES CHART PROVIDES KEY INFORMATION ABOUT THE
FINANCIAL
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FINANCIALS
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 OF FAIRTRADE( TEA AND PINEAPPLES) IN THE PERIODS 2010 AND 2015 IN AUSTRIA,
FRANCE
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, GERMANY, THE NETHERLANDS AND NORWAY. THE UNITS ARE MEASURED IN MILLIONS OF ERUOS. AT GLANCE, THE TEA PROFITABLE IN
FRANCE
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 JUMPED SIGNIFICANTLY DURING THE PERIOD,
AS WELL AS
Linking Words
 THE
SALES
Use synonyms
 OF PINEAPPLES.
ACCORDING TO
Linking Words
 WHAT IS SHOWN IN THE FIRST TABLE, THE NUMBER OF
SALES
Use synonyms
 IN
FRANCE
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 WAS 2.5 TOTAL IN 2010,
THEN
Linking Words
 IT SOARED TO 21 SUM THOUGHOUT 2015.
MOREOVER
Linking Words
 Linking Words Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.
,
Punctuation problem
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GERMANY AND NORWAY
,
Punctuation problem
apply
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 WITNESSED A MODEST GROWTH DURING THE SAME PERIOD WITH LEES THAN 1
MILLION
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.
WHILE
Linking Words
,
Punctuation problem
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 IN AUSTRIA AND NETHERLANDS THE FIGURE OF
SALES
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 EXPERIENCED A SMALL RISE FROM 2 AND 4 TO 2.7 AND 8 RESPECTIVELY. IN TERMS OF THE SECOND GRAPH, THE
SALES
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 OF
PINEAPPLS IN
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pineapples in
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 2010 WERE 16
MILLION
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 EUROS IN AUSTRIA.
SUBSEQUENTLY
Linking Words
, IT JUMPED TO THE PEAKS WITH 48
MILLION
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 IN 2015.
FURTHERMORE
Linking Words
, THE PINEAPPLE
SALES
Use synonyms
 IN
FRANCE
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 AND THE NETHERLANDS STARTED WITH 2 AND 1.6 ,
THEN
Linking Words
 THEY REACHED 6.5 AND 5 RESPECTIVELY. FOR THE REMAINING, THE
SALES
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 IN NORWAY DECREASED FROM 3 TO 1.9
MILLION
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, AND IN GERMANY FROM 2.8 TO 2
MILLION
Use synonyms
.

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Basic structure: Use less body paragraphs.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words france, sales, million with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "tables" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "jumped" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
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