IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The graph below shows average carbon dioxide (Coz) emissions per personin the United Kingdom, Sweden, ltaly and Portugal between 1967 and 2007.

The graph below shows average carbon dioxide (Coz) emissions per personin the United Kingdom, Sweden, ltaly and Portugal between 1967 and 2007.
The line graph compares the amount of individual carbon dioxide
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emission
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emissions
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 in 4 countries over a period of 40
years
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.
It is clear that
Linking Words
 the residents in the UK emitted the highest amount of CO2
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on averagely
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averagely
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average
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 through the entire period shown.
On the contrary
Linking Words
, Portugal had the lowest volume of CO2 emissions in each year. In 1967, the CO2
emission
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at
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in
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 the UK ranked first among the four, generating around 11 metric
tonnes
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,
while
Linking Words
 the
last
Linking Words
 country—Portugal—just emitted about 1 metric tonne.
However
Linking Words
, among the following
years
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, all the countries except the UK witnessed a sharp increase,
increased
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increase
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by
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of
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 2 metric
tonnes
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 in the average.
Upon
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In
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 1977, CO2
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emission
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emissions
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 in Sweden rose to its peak of 10.5 metric
tonnes
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, and
then
Linking Words
 it dropped dramatically in the
later
Correct word choice
following
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years
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,
while
Linking Words
 its Italy and Portugal
counterpart
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counterparts
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kept
Wrong verb form
continued to
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 increase
the
Correct article usage
apply
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emission
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emissions
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 over the
later
Correct word choice
following
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 30
years
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. It was in 1987, CO2
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emission
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emissions
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 in Italy overtook
the
Correct article usage
those
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in Sweden
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Sweden
Punctuation problem
Sweden,
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became
Wrong verb form
becoming
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 the second. By 2007, Portugal’s
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emission
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emissions
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 rose to the same amount
of
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as
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 Sweden at 5.5 metric
tonnes
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eventually
Rephrase
apply
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.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
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Vocabulary: Replace the words emission, years, co, tonnes with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "amount" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 3 times.
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