Some people think that the teenagers should concentrate on all subjects at school. Others believe that teenagers should focus on the subject they are best at or they are most interested in. To what extent do you agree?

Many people believed that the
teengers
Correct your spelling
teenagers
should be
baying
Use the right word
paying
show examples
attention to all
subjects
Use synonyms
equally.
While
Linking Words
thers
Correct your spelling
there
,
think
Correct pronoun usage
they think
show examples
they
most
Fix the agreement mistake
apply
show examples
only focus on the
matiral
Correct your spelling
material
they are best at or
preffered
Correct your spelling
preferred
subject only. In my opinion, I believe that students should be covering all
subjects
Use synonyms
to have
clear
Correct article usage
a clear
show examples
clue about various
soureces
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sources
of knowledge.
However
Linking Words
, studying different types of
subjects
Use synonyms
,not only the one that the teenagers are
exstllant
Correct your spelling
excellent
at, will
extende
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extend
their ability to deal with the
rapidly
Replace the word
rapid
show examples
growth of technology and other types of
sceince
Correct your spelling
science
because
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
focusing
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
favourite
matirales
Correct your spelling
materials
could lead to
be
Verb problem
apply
show examples
a weakness
points
Fix the agreement mistake
point
show examples
in their
academy
Replace the word
academic
show examples
journey.
For example
Linking Words
, many
collage
Use the right word
college
show examples
students can't be in med school
due to
Linking Words
the
leak
Use the right word
lack
show examples
of their education
at
Change preposition
in
show examples
high school . Baying attention to all material will increase the chances that
teenager
Fix the agreement mistake
teenagers
show examples
will have more options in the future for the jobs they can have,
for instance
Linking Words
, people who
had
Wrong verb form
have
show examples
cover
Replace the word
covered
show examples
all mathematics
at
Change preposition
in
show examples
high school will have
better
Correct article usage
a better
show examples
acdemy
Correct your spelling
academic
degree in science and have more public knowledge. In conclusion, I believe that teenagers most study all
subjects
Use synonyms
they
give
Wrong verb form
are given
show examples
for better education and
increas
Correct your spelling
increase
the academic opportunities in the future.

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task response
Your view is clear, but you need more full reasons and a clear example to back it. Start with your view in the first line, then give 2-3 reasons and one clear example.
coherence and cohesion
The essay has some good links but the order of ideas is not smooth. Use a clear plan: intro, 2 body parts, and a short end. Start each paragraph with one main idea and use small words to connect ideas.
content
The idea of studying all subjects is carried through in most of the text.
structure
Some use of linking words like 'However' and 'For example'.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • well-rounded education
  • versatile skill set
  • personal development
  • future career opportunities
  • identify strengths
  • satisfying career
  • successful career
  • critical thinking
  • problem-solving skills
  • academic burnout
  • diverse curriculum
  • learning experience
  • engaging and stimulating
  • solid grounding
  • well-rounded individuals
  • diverse conversations
  • different perspectives
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