Some feel governments should invest in preserving minority languages, while others feel this is not a good use of resources. Discuss both views and give your own opinion

There is no denying the fact that authorities should spend on the education
fields
Fix the agreement mistake
field
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to improve the students' capacity.
While
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it is a commonly held belief that preserving minority languages is one of these fields, there is
also
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an argument that opposes it.
This
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essay will analyse
this
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topic from both points of
view
Punctuation problem
view,
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followed by my own opinion. On one hand, some people consider that the secondary tongue plays a crucial role in enhancing the
population
Check wording
population's
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culture.
In other words
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, they say that unions should be interested in
this
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field.
Furthermore
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, they think
this
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approach can increase the opportunities for adults.
In addition
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, studying other languages can bring greater success for the new generation and the economic situation.
For example
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, when the inhabitants plan to study abroad,
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also
Correct pronoun usage
it also
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plays a vital role in bringing
the
Correct article usage
apply
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foreign investments.
Finally
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, it has many benefits for the financial process and the quality of life.
On the other hand
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, many bodies feel that concern about
this
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topic is not a perfect idea to use the resources. It
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also
Verb problem
is also
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possible to say that
this
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trend can waste the state budget without any revenue and advantages for the public. What is more, some countries only depend on their native language.
Otherwise
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, they only focus on one or two talks at the maximum.
For instance
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, some systems give all support to the mother tongue, English and French, because they suppose that other languages are not important. In conclusion, there are no easy answers to
this
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question. On balance,
however
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, I tend to believe that
this
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issue relies on many factors, but the leading factor is the adaptability of applicants.

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task response
Use a clear view in the intro and make sure every paragraph links to it.
coherence
Give more depth to ideas with reasons and simple examples.
grammar
Check grammar: main mistakes come from wrong word choices and sentence structure.
content
Use specific, relevant examples to back up points.
structure
Finish with a strong conclusion that restates your view.
structure
The essay has a structure with an intro, two body parts, and a conclusion.
content
There are some relevant ideas about language and economy.
content
Attempts to discuss both sides show awareness of task.
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