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Writing Samples
Band 7.5

The pie chart gives information about the country of birth of people living in Australia and the table shows where people born in these countries live.

The pie chart gives information about the country of birth of people living in Australia and the table shows where people born in these countries live.
The pie chart shows information about the country of birth of
people
Use synonyms
 living in Australia , and the table illustrates the proportion of
people
Use synonyms
 who decided to live in a city or rural area.
Overall
Linking Words
,
it is clear that
Linking Words
 from the pie chart vast majority of
people
Use synonyms
 who were born in Australia are natives themselves.
According to
Linking Words
 the table, Chinese
people
Use synonyms
 are the most predominant city dwellers,
whereas
Linking Words
 New Zealanders are the least. As stated by the pie chart, Australia has the highest share, at 73%, percentage by other nations
make
Wrong verb form
making
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 up the second largest, at 14%. Followed by smaller numbers of groups of
people
Use synonyms
, the UK, New Zealand, China and the Netherlands (7%,3%, 2%, and 1% respectively). Turning to the table, the urbanisation rate is at its climax for Chinese
people
Use synonyms
(staggering 99%).
Similarly
Linking Words
, the proportion of residents of the Netherlands and the UK who choose to live in cities is nearly the same rate, at 90% and 89% respectively. New Zealand has the highest rural area
people
Use synonyms
 , which is 20 per cent.

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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 69%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words people with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "table" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 2 times.
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