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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Fast food is becoming a part of people's daily life everwhere, and this has had negative effects on our lifestyle and diet. Do you agree or disagree?

There is no denying the fact that fast
food
Use synonyms
 has been a part of
people
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's lives.
While
Linking Words
 it is a commonly held belief that these habit has disadvantages on
people
Use synonyms
's life and their fitness, there is an argument that opposes it. In my opinion, I consider that fast
food
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 is affecting
people
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's lives negatively.
To begin
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 with, restaurants play a crucial bad role in
people
Use synonyms
's health.
In other words
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, eating from restaurants every day can have a significant and serious impact on your health.
In addition
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, not all restaurants look for good quality in other foods ; they just think about how they can make money.
For example
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, if you eat at home, you will be healthier than a person
prefers
Correct pronoun usage
who prefers
show examples
 to eat fast
food
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,
according to
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 the Saudi Ministry of Health,
people
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 who do not eat fast
food
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 are not just healthier, but
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
also
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 stronger and fitter. Another point to consider,
nowadays
Punctuation problem
nowadays,
show examples
people
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 who go outside have less activity. It is
also
Linking Words
 possible to say that in the past,
people
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 often when they go to a park
cook
Verb problem
to cook
show examples
, which helped them to enjoy their time.
Moreover
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, it makes us lazy to cook when we go out with our friends.
For instance
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, if you invite your family to your house, you will order delivery
food
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 because most
people
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 can not cook extremely well. In conclusion, despite
people
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 having different views. I believe that fast
food
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 effect on
people
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 negatively
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
however
Linking Words
, now it has become essential in any country because
people
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 need fast
food
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 in various situations, but
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
 they should deal with it in wisdom.

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weakness
Make the intro show a clear plan and your view in one sentence.
tip
Use more linking words to connect ideas and show flow.
tip
Give clear examples that fit each idea rather than many general notes.
improvement
Check grammar and keep short, plain sentence to avoid long, hard words.
strength
You take a clear view on fast food and its effect.
strength
There are some ideas about links between life, work, and food.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Ubiquitous
  • Convenience
  • Nutrition
  • Obesity epidemic
  • Lifestyle diseases
  • Processed foods
  • Caloric intake
  • Socioeconomic status
  • Health implications
  • Dietary patterns
  • Globalization of diet
  • Health-conscious
  • Regulatory measures
  • Consumer behavior
  • Marketing strategies
  • Junk food
  • Preventive healthcare
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