Many believe that modern technology has brought people together, but others say that it has driven us apart. Discuss both viewpoints and give your own opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge and experience.

It is
undeniable
Correct article usage
an undeniable
show examples
fact that without technology
people's
Punctuation problem
, people's
show examples
life
Wrong verb form
lives are
show examples
like
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
hell.
Majority
Correct article usage
The majority
show examples
of
masses
Correct article usage
the masses
show examples
thought that modern innovation makes us
more
Fix the agreement mistake
apply
show examples
closer
than
Change preposition
to
show examples
each other
but
Punctuation problem
, but
show examples
on the other
Linking Words
hand
Add a comma
hand,
show examples
they
analyses
Correct subject-verb agreement
analyse
show examples
that these gadgets and machines promote the separation. I
willl
Correct your spelling
will
discuss both opinions and represent my viewpoint in the forthcoming paragraphs. There are some

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

language
Improve grammar and sentence form. Use simple, correct sentences with subject-verb agreement and proper plural forms.
structure
Plan a clear essay: start with a simple introduction that states both views and your own position, then write two body paragraphs (one for each view) and finish with a short conclusion.
cohesion
Use linking words to join ideas smoothly, such as however, also, in addition, for example, and as a result.
content
Give concrete examples from life or common tech use to back up your points, instead of general ideas.
content
The essay tries to discuss both sides of the issue.
cohesion
There is some use of linking words to connect ideas.
content
The author states a personal view, which is a good step in IELTS tasks.
Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general
Topic Vocabulary:
  • connectivity
  • communicate
  • social media
  • virtual meetings
  • global community
  • isolation
  • distract
  • face-to-face interaction
  • personal connections
  • dependency
  • technology addiction
  • digital divide
What to do next:
Look at other essays: