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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Some people say that distance learning is a quick and effective way to study. Others, however, disagree and say that distance learning programs can never be as good as courses taken in person. Do you agree or disagree with the statement?

In today’s modern world advancement of technologies has transferred every aspect of human life , including people's learning choices. Some people said that online education is good for
Use synonyms
study
Replace the word
studying
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.
While
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 others believe that an in-person class is more effective than an online class. I completely agree with the first notion , and my inclination would be justified in the following paragraph.
Firstly
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, one of the most significant advantages of online application is that it reduces the cost of education. In simple terms, there is no need to travel daily to school to
study
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.
As a result
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, money for commuting has been minus.
Secondly
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, gap learning offers a wide range of studies and flexibility for individuals , so people can
study
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as per
Change preposition
at
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 their own
time
Check wording
pace
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.
Thus
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, many
community
Fix the agreement mistake
communities
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 believe that area learning is a good way to
application
Replace the word
apply
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.
However
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, on the other side
in-class
Punctuation problem
, in-class
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 application has some advantages.
For example
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, during offline
Use synonyms
study
Add a comma
study,
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 individuals develop skills like team building, discipline & unity because they were under the guidance of teachers in school.
Additionally
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, every person has a different learning ability , so in-class
study
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 , teachers have a chance to guide students whenever they need help.
However
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,
this
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 problem can be minimised in online lectures under the supervision of parents. In summary, in-class
although
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 in class lectures offer individuals to develop core skills like team building and discipline. But distance learning helps to reduce the cost of
study
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 and offers flexibility, and a wide range of
study
Use synonyms
 materials. I believe that distance education is a good way to
study
Use synonyms
.

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Task focus
Keep to one view. Say you agree with online learning and do not mix with in person.
Content development
Give clear reasons and support them with short, real examples.
Coherence
Use simple link words to show how your ideas fit together.
Grammar
Check grammar and spell common words to make meaning easy.
Strength
The essay shows a clear stance on the topic.
Content
Some good ideas about cost and flexibility of online study.
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • **Useful Vocabulary:**
  • 1. **Distance learning**: A way of studying where tuition is carried out over the Internet or other electronic media.
  • 2. **Flexible schedule**: Time-table that allows students to manage their own study hours.
  • 3. **Remote access**: The ability to access educational content from any location.
  • 4. **Cost-effective**: Economical; good value in relation to the money, time, or effort spent.
  • 5. **Digital literacy**: The ability to effectively use digital tools and platforms.
  • 6. **Self-discipline**: The ability to control one's behavior, emotions, and thoughts in the pursuit of long-term goals.
  • 7. **Hands-on experience**: Practical experience in a field of study, usually gained through physical participation.
  • 8. **Technological barriers**: Challenges related to the availability or use of technology.
  • 9. **Employer perception**: The way that employers view or regard a qualification or skill.
  • 10. **In-person interaction**: Face-to-face communication and engagement.
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