Nowadays, children spend a lot of time playing computer games and little time doing sports. Why is this happening? Is this a positive or negative development ?

These days, allocation of
substantial
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a substantial
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amount of time has become a daily routine
of
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for
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majority
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the majority
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of teenagers around the world and the term
of
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apply
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sport is forgotten almost entirely for them. I strongly believe that it is the influence of the development in
the
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apply
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terms of gadgets which changed the lifestyles of
human-beings
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human beings
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to
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apply
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180 degrees. Obviously, it is
adversive
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adverse
for them, since
,
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apply
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it replaced the fruitful habits and interests
including
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, including
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sports
Use synonyms
.
Firstly
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, the rapid advancement of technology has made computer games more attractive and accessible for everyone. Modern games are designed with
captivative
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captivating
graphics, realistic sound effects, and engaging stories that can easily attract the attention of young people.
Additionally
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, the widespread availability of smartphones and personal computers allows children to play anytime and anywhere. Resulting
the
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in the type of
the
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apply
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leisure time activity to virtгal rather than
sports
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. Another important reason behind
this
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trend is the lack of encouragement and facilities for
sports
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. In many
residental
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residential
areas, safe playgrounds and
sports
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clubs are limited or expensive, which is
the
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an
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obstacle
for
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to
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participation.
Additionally
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, parents often put academic success over physical development,making it really hard to add some exercises to their schedule. In conclusion, the growing popularity of computer games among children can be mainly related to technological progress and the lack of opportunities for physical activities. And
this
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trend is extremely negative, as it distracts people
in
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from
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maintaining healthy lifestyles and the development of valuable personal qualities. So, it is essential for parents and educators to encourage children to balance their time between virtual entertainment and real-life physical exercise.

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task
The answer to the task is clear: it says why games grow and that this is not good. But give more direct reasons and a short plan at the start.
coherence
content
The essay shows a clear view that the trend is negative.
structure
Two ideas are given: tech as a reason and lack of sports.
structure
There is a conclusion that links to the main idea.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • allure
  • captivate
  • supervise
  • accessible
  • scarcity
  • safer alternative
  • peer pressure
  • educational tools
  • cognitive skills
  • implications
  • obesity
  • poor posture
  • hand-eye coordination
  • problem-solving abilities
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