IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The pie charts below show how dangerous waste products are dealt with in three countries.

The pie charts below show how dangerous waste products are dealt with in three countries.
The pie charts illustrate the difference between how dangerous waste goods are dealt with in three countries
-
Punctuation problem
:
show examples
Republic
Correct article usage
the Republic
show examples
 of
Korea
Use synonyms
,
Sweden
Use synonyms
, and the United Kingdom.
Overall
Linking Words
, the UK and
Sweden
Use synonyms
 represented the largest
proportion
Use synonyms
 of underground. The most notable figure is that incineration was the lowest in all three countries.
According to
Linking Words
 the UK, the percentage of underground represented the highest
proportion
Use synonyms
 with 82%.
However
Linking Words
, chemical treatment and dumping at sea showed the same figure at 8%. Meanwhile, the number of
incineration
Fix the agreement mistake
incinerations
show examples
 experienced the lowest position with only 2%. Moving to
Korea
Use synonyms
 and
Sweden
Use synonyms
 experienced the lowest amount of incineration, with 9% and 20%, respectively.
Moreover
Linking Words
, the percentage of recycling secured the highest
proportion
Use synonyms
 in
Korea
Use synonyms
 at 22%.
Likewise
Linking Words
, the percentage of underground showed the largest
proportion
Use synonyms
 at approximately 55%.
In contrast
Linking Words
, the UK used chemical treatment and dumping at sea to deal with some waste products,
while
Linking Words
Korea
Use synonyms
 and
Sweden
Use synonyms
 didn’t have that kind of material.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 70%.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words korea, sweden, proportion with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "represented" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "showed" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 4 times.
▼
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • dangerous waste
  • recycling
  • incineration
  • waste management
  • percentage
  • burial
  • environmental impact
  • strategy
  • comparison
  • significant
  • methodology
  • effective
  • implications
  • trend analysis
What to do next:
Look at other essays: