IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

City living in the 21st century is stressful and offers no advantages. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

We live in the modern era
which
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, which
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 has lots of benefits.
nowadays
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Nowadays
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,
city
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life
Use synonyms
 is a topic to discuss in many countries. I disagree with the idea that living in
Use synonyms
city
Correct article usage
a city
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 can be
worried
Correct word choice
worrisome
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 or stressful to some extent. First of all, living in
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city
Correct article usage
a city
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 has a lot of potential
advantage
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advantages
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 which can make our
life
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 easier. By
this
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 I mean that
,
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apply
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 you can become familiar with different cultures,
custom
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customs
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 and traditions, and
also
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 in terms of
economic
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economics
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, it
provid
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provides
 you
many
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with many
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 job opportunities or
better
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a better
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 income.
Linking Words
Moreover
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Moreover,
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 you have easy
acsses
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access
 to many
fisilities
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facilities
such
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 as medical care, cultural
center
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centre
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, shops, library and educational
center
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centre
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 which all of
them
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which
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 give you a
comfort
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comfortable
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 lifestyle in
a
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an
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 easy way.
Linking Words
Therefore
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Therefore,
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 it is really
benefical
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beneficial
 for
everyone
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everyone,
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spessially
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especially
 young
people
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.
For instance
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,
they
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there
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 is plenty to do in cities which can
addes
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add
 joy and zest to our
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life
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lives
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.
Secondly
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, given the current economic climate, in many cases living in
Use synonyms
city
Correct article usage
a city
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 can be hard for special types of
people
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, I mean that ageing
indivedulas
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individuals
 or some
people
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 that are on a tough budget
becuse
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because
 they have to work hard to meet their needs
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, thatsway
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thatsway
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that way
, they
useully
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usually
 have
cramped
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a cramped
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 schedule and
hectic
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a hectic
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 lifestyle.
so
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So
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, these issues can cause a stressful lifestyle. I think if
people
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 have
Correct article usage
an orgnized
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orgnized
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organised
 plan, they can tackle financial issues,
for example
Linking Words
, they could
working
Wrong verb form
work
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 in multiple
fiels
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fields
 to make more money. In conclusion, I would like to say that
while
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 the potential
benefit
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benefits
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 of living in cities are considerable, there are
genue
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genuine
concern
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concerns
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 about it. In my opinion, the advantages of
city
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life
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is
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apply
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outwight
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outweigh
 any potential drawbacks
so
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, so
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 I disagree with the idea
which
Correct word choice
that
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city
Use synonyms
life
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 is hard and stressful.

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Task response
Make your main view clear in the first paragraph and stay with it in the end.
Task response
Give more real examples, with details like place, time, or cost to show ideas.
Coherence
Use ideas in a simple order: one idea, then another, then finish with a short note.
Language
Fix spelling and grammar so sentences are easy to read.
Task achievement
There is a clear position.
Structure
The essay has an intro, body, and conclusion.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • employment hubs
  • convenient access
  • amenities
  • cultural diversity
  • personal growth
  • fast-paced lifestyle
  • burnout
  • cost of living
  • financial strain
  • social problems
  • traffic congestion
  • noise pollution
  • overcrowding
What to do next:
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