IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The chart shows the total distance travelled by passengers on five types of transport in the UK between 1990 and 2000.

The chart shows the total distance travelled by passengers on five types of transport in the UK between 1990 and 2000.
The given bar chart illustrates the total distance covered by passengers with different methods of transport in the UK in two years, 1990 and 2000.
Overall
Linking Words
, using buses and trains was the popular way to move from
a
Correct article usage
one
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 place to another,
while
Linking Words
 travelling with bikes , bicycles
Punctuation problem
,
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as well as
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 planes occurred at much lower proportions during the period. In detail , the total number of
kilometres
Use synonyms
 travelled increased from 100
billion
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 to 110
billion
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 in 2000 ,compared with 1990.
However
Linking Words
, the largest share of
kilometres
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 was covered by bus , which rose from 35
billion
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kilometres
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 to approximately 45
billion
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kilometres
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 .
Also
Linking Words
,similar to buses ,moving by train was a popular choice with nearly 40
billion
Use synonyms
kilometres
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 in 2000.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, taking the distance by bicycle, bike, or plane remained unpopular compared to other choices, with a percentage under 10
billion
Use synonyms
 during the whole decade. In conclusion , rail and buses were so important for travel in the UK between 1990 and 2000 .

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Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words kilometres, billion with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "compared" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
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