IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

An increasing number of professionals such as doctors and teachers are leaving their own poorer countries to work in developed countries. What are the problems associated with and some possible solutions?

Nowadays, numerous doctors and teachers are giving up on their
country
Use synonyms
 and migrating to developed regions. There are some significant
reason
Fix the agreement mistake
reasons
show examples
because of
Change preposition
for
show examples
 unemployment, low income in education and health , as well
high
Correct word choice
as high
show examples
 taxes on accommodations and bills.
However
Linking Words
, there are
also
Linking Words
 some ways to overcome the problems.
the
Fix capitalization
The
show examples
 most common issue is
jobs
Use synonyms
 in a poor
country
Use synonyms
 because of corruption. When citizens apply for
jobs
Use synonyms
 in
education
Correct article usage
the education
show examples
 and health sectors. Mostly,
higher ups
Use the right word
higher-ups
show examples
 refused
application
Fix the agreement mistake
applications
show examples
of
Change preposition
from
show examples
 poor citizens, and they accepted wealthy applicants who
payed
Verb problem
paid
show examples
 them well. The
government
Use synonyms
 is uninformed and ineligible to solve
issue
Fix the agreement mistake
issues
show examples
 with old policies.
Thus
Linking Words
,
in
Change preposition
as
show examples
Correct article usage
a result
show examples
result
Add a comma
result,
show examples
 most professional citizens are
living
Verb problem
leaving
show examples
 the
country
Use synonyms
.
However
Linking Words
, the best way a
government
Use synonyms
 should
made
Wrong verb form
make
show examples
 new policies which can
help to
Correct word order
to help
show examples
 eliminate corruption
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
 people can get
jobs
Use synonyms
 on merit.
Secondly
Linking Words
, the most significant issue is daily life expenses. The money, employees are getting from the
government
Use synonyms
 sectors
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
show examples
 not sufficient to pay for transportation, electricity and other daily expenses.
For instance
Linking Words
, in Pakistan, countless individuals from professional sectors have migrated to
United
Correct article usage
the United
show examples
 Kingdom, Australia
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
still
Verb problem
are still
show examples
 applying for
jobs
Use synonyms
 through online websites. Now, the
government
Use synonyms
 should take funds from foreign countries and make
aggrements
Correct your spelling
agreements
 to
allievate
Correct your spelling
alleviate
this
Linking Words
 major problem. In many
coutries
Correct your spelling
countries
, high taxes are applied on
nation's
Check wording
nations
show examples
. In many
cases
Add a comma
cases,
show examples
 even
few
Correct article usage
a few
show examples
 people do not have money to eat food twice in a day.
There
Correct pronoun usage
They
show examples
 are taking
loan
Fix the agreement mistake
loans
show examples
 from online
application
Fix the agreement mistake
applications
show examples
 and from
government
Use synonyms
 banks to pay rent and to pay electricity bills.
This
Linking Words
 situation forced them to leave
Use synonyms
country
Correct article usage
the country
show examples
.
Last
Linking Words
 year, 1500 Pakistani locals
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
 migrated to
others
Fix the agreement mistake
other
show examples
coutries
Correct your spelling
countries
by
Change preposition
apply
show examples
illegal
Replace the word
illegally
show examples
way
Check wording
apply
show examples
. In
reports
Add a comma
reports,
show examples
 it is noticed that some are well-educated. The
government
Use synonyms
 should reduce taxes no matter what it takes.
Overall
Linking Words
,
main
Correct article usage
the main
show examples
 point is to reduce corruption by making new policies.
Moreover
Linking Words
,
Use synonyms
government
Correct article usage
the government
show examples
 should make
their
Fix the agreement mistake
its
show examples
 economy strong by making
aggrements
Correct your spelling
agreements
 with developed countries.

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organization
Plan a clear layout: start with a brief intro, then 2–3 short body paragraphs about problems, then a short conclusion.
task response
Develop each point with a little detail and a simple example. Show how it leads to people leaving the country.
grammar
Use shorter, simple sentences and fix grammar mistakes to make ideas easy to follow.
lexis
Choose words carefully; try to keep to familiar, common words and avoid hard phrasing.
coherence
Link ideas with basic connectives (and, but, because, so) to make the flow better.
task response
Finish with a clear conclusion that restates the main idea and your view on the issue.
content
The essay discusses a real problem and why it happens.
example
It mentions a country example to illustrate the point.
idea
There is a sense of a solution aimed at reducing corruption and improving economy.
scope
The writer tries to connect issues in poor and rich regions.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Brain drain
  • Skilled labor
  • Developed nations
  • Essential services
  • Healthcare
  • Education
  • Economic impact
  • Social impact
  • Migration
  • Inequality
  • Disparity
  • Foreign aid
  • Investment
  • Community
  • Dependency
What to do next:
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