IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

The bar chart shows the types of media that people of different age groups used to get daily news in one country in 2011. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The bar chart provides key information about the genres of channels that individuals of different age classes
used
Wrong verb form
use
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 to receive the news.
Overall
Linking Words
, it is clear from the graph that there are five categories of age groups,
From
Fix capitalization
from
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 10 to above 65 years.
In addition
Linking Words
, there are three sources of news
,
Punctuation problem
:
show examples
radio
Use synonyms
, social platforms and
micro blogging
Use the right word
microblogging
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.
According to
Linking Words
 what is shown, the
radio
Use synonyms
 is the most famous device
in
Change preposition
across
show examples
 all
ages
Fix the agreement mistake
age
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except
Check wording
groups except
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 youngsters,
while
Linking Words
 the new generations
opted
Wrong verb form
opt
show examples
 for modern apps to obtain
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
information. In terms of people above 50 years, about 80% of them used the
radio
Use synonyms
,
whereas
Linking Words
 under 40% tend to use social media tools
,
Punctuation problem
.
show examples
However
Linking Words
, the
micro blogging
Use the right word
microblogging
show examples
 has less attractive
overall
Linking Words
. In class
30-49yeas
Correct your spelling
30-49 years
, approximately 90% of them select the
radio
Use synonyms
, and the advanced instruments come as the second option of data generation.
In
Change preposition
Among
show examples
 teenagers,
the
Correct article usage
apply
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most
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
young adults tend to use their phones and
internet
Correct article usage
the internet
show examples
 to get
any
Fix the agreement mistake
apply
show examples
facts
around
Change preposition
about
show examples
 the world. In conclusion, many bodies still
stich
Correct your spelling
stick
 to outdated machines to
recognize
Change the spelling
recognise
show examples
 any updates around them.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "overall".
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Basic structure: Use less body paragraphs.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words radio with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "information" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 2 times.
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