Some people think that competition at work, at school and in daily life is a good thing. Others believe that we should try to cooperate more, rather than competing against each other. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

No matter

wheather

Correct your spelling

whether

it is at a workplace or school,

competition

Use synonyms

is impossible to

be avoided

Wrong verb form

avoid

show examples

when we interact with

people

Use synonyms

. Having the mentality to compete with each other can be beneficial for

overall

Linking Words

performance,

whereas

Linking Words

others think collaboration plays a more important role in success.

Similarly

Linking Words

, I

also

Linking Words

believe that cooperation has more advantages than pure

competition

Use synonyms

. It is argued that competing with peers can bring motivation to work and

further

Linking Words

achieve higher performance.

Besides

Linking Words

, it

also

Linking Words

enhances innovation and creates progress when there are multiple competitors in an industry.

For instance

Linking Words

, IBM invented the first personal computer decades ago, but

later

Verb problem

was later

show examples

caught up by Apple. Thanks to the

competition

Use synonyms

between these two companies, consumers from all over the world are

benefit

Replace the word

benefiting

show examples

from their

cutting-edgy

Use the right word

cutting-edge

show examples

technologies.

However

Linking Words

, pure

competition

Use synonyms

can

also

Linking Words

lead to

negative

Correct article usage

a negative

show examples

impact in many aspects. On the one hand,

people

Use synonyms

might spend too much effort focusing on their competitors

instead

Linking Words

concentrating

Correct word choice

of concentrating

show examples

on themselves and optimising their products.

On the other hand

Linking Words

, it can easily cause jealousy and mental stress among individuals.

In contrast

Linking Words

, collaborating with each other

even

Punctuation problem

, even

show examples

with

rivals

Punctuation problem

rivals,

show examples

can reach success in a surprising way.

Firstly

Linking Words

team work

Use the right word

teamwork

show examples

creates

inspirations

Fix the agreement mistake

inspiration

show examples

and sparks ideas. When

people

Use synonyms

who come from different backgrounds gather together, they can bring creative thoughts and new ways of thinking.

Secondly

Linking Words

, individuals who have shortcomings and strengths can supplement each other when they work together

Punctuation problem

apply

show examples

and reach the goal more efficiently.

Last

Linking Words

but not least, no one is an island

and

Punctuation problem

, and

show examples

we all live in a society

that

Correct word choice

where

show examples

we constantly have interactions. Cooperation helps us to learn more about the

people

Use synonyms

surround us and

further

Linking Words

develop

deeper

Correct article usage

a deeper

show examples

relationship. To

conlude

Correct your spelling

conclude

competition

Use synonyms

has many advantages in terms of progress and performance.

However

Linking Words

, I argue that collaboration has

Correct article usage

a more

show examples

significant effect in the long-term.

chenpinxi530

Dec 4, 2025

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task response

Add more clear and deep ideas for each view, with more facts or examples from life or study.

coherence

Make topic sentences clear and use simple link words to connect ideas.

language

Check spelling and grammar; fix mistakes like 'wheather' and 'conlude'.

structure

Write a stronger conclusion that restates your view.

lexical

Use plain words; avoid long or hard words.

content

The essay discusses both sides and gives a clear opinion.

structure

There are paragraph breaks and some linking words.

example

Example of IBM vs. Apple is used.

coherence

The plan is easy to follow.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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14
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
17
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

300 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

innovation
productivity
excel
outperform
advancements
academic standards
work ethic
stress
anxiety
unhealthy rivalries
harmonious
supportive
collaborative learning
social skills
communication skills
sense of community
collective goals

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Some people think that competition at work, at school and in daily life is a good thing. Others believe that we should try to cooperate more, rather than competing against each other. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

In some countries, owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people. Why might this be the case? Do you think this is a positive or negative situation?

Some people think that strict punishments for driving offenses are the key to reducing traffic accidents. Others, however, believe that other measures would be more effective in improving road safety. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

in some countries, it is illegal for companies to reject job applicants for their age. Is this a possitive or negative development?

The internet has transformed the way information is shared and consumed, but it has also created problems that did not exist before. What are the most serious problems associated with the internet and what solutions can you suggest?