IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

The bar chart below shows current health expenditure totals as percentages of GDP* for various European countries for the years 2002, 2007 and 2012.

The bar chart illustrates health expenditure of Gross Domestic Product
through out
Use the right word
throughout
show examples
 the years 2002, 2007 and 2017, in 12 European countries. Units are measured in percentage. In
geneal
Correct your spelling
general
, it is clearly seen that
Switzerland
Use synonyms
 was the leader in all three years, but
Estonia
Use synonyms
 had the lowest GDP in the time period. In more detail, in
2012
Punctuation problem
2012,
show examples
Switzerland
Use synonyms
's, Belgium's and Norway's GDP was the highest, reaching about 11%, 10% and 10% respectively.
However
Linking Words
,
Estonia
Use synonyms
 had a significantly lower total value of goods in 2012, only around 3%. In
2007
Punctuation problem
2007,
show examples
counries
Correct your spelling
countries
 with the biggest Gross Domestic Product were
Switzerland
Use synonyms
 and France with 11%, and Belgium with approximately 11%. Again,
Estonia
Use synonyms
 had the least amount of GDP, just around 3%, following Lithuania with slightly more-5%. In comparison with the latter years, in 2002 there were 4 countries with Gross Domestic Product higher than 10%,
Switzerland
Use synonyms
 measuring at about 11%, Norway, Denmark and Belgium
totalling
Punctuation problem
, totalling
show examples
 10%.
Estonia
Use synonyms
 and Lithuania
stayed
Verb problem
stood
show examples
last
Linking Words
standing
Check wording
apply
show examples
at 3% and 5%.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Basic structure: Change the second paragraph.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words switzerland, estonia with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Health expenditure
  • Percentage of GDP
  • Trend analysis
  • Economic prosperity
  • Health outcomes
  • Quality of healthcare
  • Allocation of resources
  • Healthcare services
  • Political, social, and economic factors
  • International organizations
  • Government policies
  • Predictive trends
What to do next:
Look at other essays: