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Writing Samples
Band 6

Nowadays the way many people interact with each other has changed because of technology. In what ways has technology affected the types of relation people make? Has that become a positive or negative development?

Since the world has gone digital, the way individuals socialise has
also
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 changed significantly. Now, most
people
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 prefer to be on their phones rather than talk to those physically present.
This
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 leads partners to cheat and
children
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 to misbehave. I,
therefore
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, think that
this
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 development is negative because it breaks relationships
instead
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 of building them. The essay below will discuss these ideas at length.
To begin
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 with, the introduction of technology was meant to create strong relationships among
people
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. It is unfortunate that the same tools are used to destroy families. Some households now have better relations with
people
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 far away than those living with them.
For instance
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, recent studies show that about seventy per cent of divorce cases are linked to cellphones , which are used to start and maintain extramarital affairs.
Hence
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, technology is a negative development because
instead
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 of building relationships, it is destroying a lot of good families living single parents struggling with
children
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.
Furthermore
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, online tools now have content
that is
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 a bad influence on
children
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. Certain information and videos ,
such
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 as pornographic materials
,
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apply
show examples
 and
people
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 abusing drugs, have affected young
people
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 tremendously.
For example
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, Australia recently banned
children
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 under 16 years of age from using online platforms as they influenced
children
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 to do wrong things ,
such
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 as gambling. I,
therefore
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, think that the coming of digitalisation has a bad influence because
people
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 now spend their time doing bad things online rather than being productive.
To conclude
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,
nowadays
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nowadays,
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 citizens no longer interact well since the introduction of the internet.
Children
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 now gamble, families are breaking up and many more issues.
Therefore
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, I think that technology is a negative development.

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content
Show both sides. Say what is good and bad, and add your own view at the end.
structure
Use one clear idea in each part. Begin with the main idea, then add a simple example.
content
Give proof that is easy to see and real. Do not rely on one fact or guess.
language
Check spelling and mark ends with full stops and commas.
organization
The start line shows the topic.
organization
There is an end that repeats the view.
content
Some examples are used to back up ideas.
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