More and more companies are allowing employees to work at home/allowing student to study at home. Do you think this is a positive or negative development ?

Many institutions allow their members to work from home.
This
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is
also
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common among educational institutions, where
students
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can complete their studies from home. I believe that allowing
this
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option helps many
workers
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and
students
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perform better at their desired duties.
To begin
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with, companies that allow their employees to work from home record a high level of achievement compared with traditional ones.
This
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is mainly
due to
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two reasons.
Firstly
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,
workers
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perform effectively when they are working in a comfortable environment, which is the case when they are at
their
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
homes
Fix the agreement mistake
home
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.
Secondly
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, companies can now hire any employee around the world.
This
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gives them accessibility to hire skilled
workers
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without being limited by their geographic position.
For instance
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, multinational companies are extremely successful
due to
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the flexibility of
workers
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' location.
Moreover
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, allowing
students
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to
study
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remotely is considered a positive development.
This
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is because many
students
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now can access a quality education, despite their location, especially
students
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who live in rural areas, where getting a good education is a challenge.
Furthermore
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, remote
study
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helps
students
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develop self-dependency skills, which is a highly important skill to master.
This
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is
due to
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the responsibility they are taking care of, starting from being on time to submitting their assignments by themselves.
As a result
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, it is valid to say that
students
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who
study
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remotely have a better set of skills academically and socially. In conclusion, I strongly support the idea of remote work or
study
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,
due to
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its wide range of benefits in many aspects of human life.

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improvement
Add more clear examples with exact facts or numbers to back each point.
grammar
Check small grammar mistakes. Use 'home' instead of 'homes' and keep phrases simple.
structure
Keep ideas simple and join them with clear steps. Start with one idea, then add a reason.
structure
End with a short view that shows both good sides, even if you favour one.
strength
Clear reasons are given for why home work and home study can be good.
linguistic
Good use of link words like First, Secondly, Moreover.
coherence
Paragraphs have a steady flow and point to the main idea.
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