Success is often measured by wealth and material belonging. Do you think wealth is the best measure of success? What makes a successful person?

Nowadays, everyone
pursue
Correct subject-verb agreement
pursues
show examples
the dream of being successful. But the main definition of being successful
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
represents a widespread subject that has sparked debate. There are a lot of
peoplewho
Correct your spelling
people who
measure their success by the digits of their wealth. It is true
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
that wealthy people
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
are
also
Linking Words
people with certain skills.
This
Linking Words
must be the reason why they continue to increase or maintain the level of their values.
However
Linking Words
,
analyzing
Change the spelling
analysing
show examples
the same individuals, we might observe that a large
procentage
Correct your spelling
percentage
of them are not happy persons.
This
Linking Words
takes us to the idea, the old
clichee
Correct your spelling
cliché
that money cannot
but
Use the right word
buy
show examples
happines
Correct your spelling
happiness
. I would say that there is something else
in addition
Linking Words
. Indeed, doing the thing that you love
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
is the
reasons
Fix the agreement mistake
reason
show examples
that gives humans great satisfaction. The cause is that they put passion and invest sentiments in their passions. In reverse, we can see that the employees
that
Correct pronoun usage
who
show examples
are forced to do a job that they detest
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
are not satisfied persons. They do not enjoy the time spent at work
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
they even do a poor job. In conclusion, success is a perfect balance between doing what you love and
also
Linking Words
gain
Wrong verb form
gaining
show examples
the necessary
amonth
Correct your spelling
amount
of wealth that will permit you the level of comfort and
weel-being
Use the right word
well-being
show examples
.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task
State a clear answer to the question in the opening line and keep a simple plan in your first paragraph.
task
Give one or two main ideas and keep them linked to the question. Do not add too many new ideas at the end.
example
Back up ideas with one or two examples from life or work.
language
Fix spelling and common grammar mistakes so your message is clear.
coherence
Use simple joining words to show how ideas relate, such as and, but, because, also.
grammar
Make short, clear sentences; avoid long, hard-to-read lines.
idea
You note that wealth is not the only mark of success.
argument
You show a balance idea: work you love plus money.
structure
Intro and conclusion show some plan.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: